Pause, reflect and reset: find the right balance for you

Do you know when it’s time for you to pause, reflect and re-set? What signs do you watch for? And HOW do you pause, reflect and re-set?

Pushing the pause button on ‘doing’

After months of squishing extra work into my life, I was really looking forward to having ‘downtime’ over the Christmas / New Year break. I could sense the momentum I’d been enjoying since Easter was gradually dragging to a halt and ‘all the things’ of life felt like they were piling on top of me. Anyone else felt that way?

It can be tricky to rein it all in, and I certainly felt that too when I finished up work for the year. Still racing, we packed up for a road trip to visit family and managed to fill every single moment of our travels with activity and socialising. Then whoosh we were back home again unpacking, cleaning up and repacking for another family visit in a different direction. We also went bushwalking, mountain bike riding and caught up with jobs around home, sadly neglected in the recent fullness of life, yet that’s what holidays are for, right? Lots of ‘doing’ to catch up on ‘all the things’ that have been getting on top of you during the year? Yes? No?

I don’t know what answer is right for you, but I do know that the important thing is to take a moment now and then to settle in to your ‘being’ self. To pause, reflect and then re-set if you need to.

Time to reflect, re-set and simply ‘be’

After a week and a half of ‘doing’, I stepped into my ‘being’ self and I’m now celebrating and protecting these moments of pause that I’ve also been yearning for.

When you pause long enough, you feel your heart beating in your chest. You hear the voices in your head and you sense what your gut is saying. You listen in to what it is you need right now. You learn to know the difference between between your inner knowing and the external voices and pressures that shape so much of your life. You reflect and have the opportunity to re-set what’s not working so well.

Reflective questions to ask yourself

When you take a moment to pause and reflect, you can ask yourself:

  • What in my life is working well for me?
  • What is not working so well?
  • What does my body, mind and spirit need?
  • What can I do differently so that I nurture myself whilst also nurturing others and the world around me?

Re-set any time you need it

These reflections always highlight any areas that will benefit from my compassion and attention. As someone who rejects “new year, new you” promises, I encourage you to take a moment of pause to reflect and re-set any time. Do it for yourself. No reason needed. Just because.


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Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections that inform, inspire and empower women to a healthy and active lifestyle.

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6 Strategic Tips for Introverts to Survive Christmas

Do you gain energy by having time in solitude? Or with other people? This is the fundamental difference between introverted and extroverted personality types. Most of us are somewhere in the middle ground of this spectrum. Although this article focuses on how introverts can survive Christmas, it’s important to remember that everyone needs a bit of time out occasionally, not only during the silly season.

Many of us are familiar with the good old technique of retreating to the bathroom when overwhelmed or needing a bit of peace and quiet, especially if you’ve been privileged to parent young children who shadow you everywhere you go! Taking yourself off to the bathroom can be an effective measure against overwhelm, albeit temporary. Yet the bathroom’s not the most desirable of places to spend Christmas Day. It’s handy to have a few other strategies up your sleeve so that you’re not relying on the one-and-only. Here are a few more strategic ideas to call into action when the social rules dictate that you socialise in a busy, noisy world, but in all honesty you’ve had quite enough.

1. Get yourself an ally

Before an expected big gathering, have a chat with your partner, a friend, your sister or someone else who’ll be there that you know will understand your predicament. Explain that if you feel overwhelmed you’ll leave the room for a few minutes. Having a support person to help you make your exit or to cover for you while you have a break can be just the buffer you need.

2. Plan solo time

If you’re holidaying with others, having a truck load of visitors, or heading out to a big family party, make your plan to have some down time or alone time to keep your energy levels well above ‘empty’. Having a regular exercise routine is a great way to recharge in solitude, or you could save a particular task for the moment you need an exit excuse:

“I’ll get this washing hung out while the sun’s out” or

“I’ve just got to check something quickly in the garden / in the car / make a phone call” or

“No, I don’t need any help but thanks for offering. You stay here and relax. I’ll be back in a moment.”

3. Space yourself

Use boundaries with yourself and others. If being a part of the crowd feels stressful, consider exiting for a few minutes, or leaving. Alternatively you can navigate your way towards someone else whose personal space is similar to yours, and spend some time chatting or simply being with them.

refresh revive energise

4. Pace yourself

Many people feel overwhelmed at Christmas time with the added expectations of going to lots of events. Be choosy. Despite what your inner voice tells you, you don’t HAVE to go to everything and you don’t have to stay for the whole time. Be choosy!

5. Pick your venue

Family and work gatherings at public places like parks and pools can be less claustrophobic and less overwhelming for some people. You can more easily wander around, check things on the periphery and enter and exit conversations as your energy levels allow.

6. Set your intention

Begin the day with a mindful intention to stay connected to an inner place of stillness despite what’s going on around you. Your breath can anchor you to your place of stillness, and because you take your breath with you everywhere you go, you don’t need any special equipment or excuses. It’s simply there within you. You might like to visualise a retreat room in your heart.

So there you go! 6 strategic tips for surviving human overwhelm over Christmas. Merry Christmas everyone!

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections in Daisy Spoke that connect, inspire and self-empower women to make healthy choices for themselves.