progress Archives

Accidentally getting it right – OR DID I?

There’s been a rock garden at the beginning of our mountain bike track on our home property ever since we built it. It’s always daunted me, especially being right at the very start! I’ve been pretty proud of how I’ve come to face some of my fears along parts of our short track including this rock garden at the beginning. As time has gone on, my progress has gone from bike hiking through the entire length of the rock garden, to riding through the first couple of metres then walking through the next bit, to finally being able to ride most of the rock garden and dabbing my right foot once or twice on the boulder on my right as I squeeze through the narrow gap between the craggy rocks.

I often walk or run along our trail as well. It’s so accessible and I don’t need to go any further afield to step into our beautiful Australian bush country! As I’ve traversed the trail over the past few months, I’ve sometimes stopped to look at the rock garden and visualise myself riding through the narrow gaps between the rocks without clunking my pedals. I knew that I would need to develop a lot more skill, line accuracy, confidence and power to ride this section. Basically I’d been riding it so slowly that I didn’t have enough power to get over the craggy rocks. Although I enjoyed my brief little fantasies of riding effortlessly over and around the rocks, I certainly didn’t have much hope that I’d ever actually be able to do it.

Last week I was closely following my husband as we rode the trail. Normally I’m a long way behind and do my own thing. I watched the line that he took through the rock garden and without even thinking about it I probably followed a very similar line, dabbed my foot once on the big boulder on the right, and kept going. I noticed quite a powerful thought come to my mind “Wow that seemed pretty much seamless.” Even though I’d dabbed my foot, it felt smooth and flowy.

A few minutes later as we rode the trail loop again, I was conscious that I was thinking about something that was upsetting me. I wasn’t very mindful of where I was or what I was doing. Suddenly I realised I’d already ridden through the rock garden! I hadn’t dabbed my foot, I didn’t jab my pedals, and the smooth flowy feeling hit the pit of my stomach and came out of my mouth with a loud shriek, my previous upset forgotten in a moment of elation as I realised what I’d done. I’d accidentally got it right!

OR HAD I? What acknowledgement do I owe MYSELF for the consistent work of practising, the walking it through, the visualisations? How often do I mindlessly disregard something I’ve achieved seeing it as a random event which I’ve had no control over? How would it be if I paused for a moment to celebrate my work and my successes, however small they might seem to another? Would this impact my perception of progress over time and keep my enjoyment and motivation rolling along?

Today as I walk the same trail and peer along the rock garden, I can clearly see the line that I need to take on my bike. The rocks seem so much smaller than before, the gaps between them seem so much wider, and I realise just how powerful the images and thoughts in our minds can be.

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections in Daisy Spoke that connect, inspire and self-empower women to make healthy choices for themselves.

Measuring Progress

Well, this time last week I was feeling quite nervous and under-prepared for Chicks in the Sticks at “Karingal” in Mt Cotton. This was my second foray into Chicks in the Sticks, a women’s specific mountain bike event hosted by RATS Cycling Club south of Brisbane. Last year I put a reasonable degree of effort into my physical and mental preparation for this event. It was my first ever attempt at racing, and when I crossed the finishing line I was pleased I’d had a go. Only I knew what internal obstacles I’d had to overcome to actually register and show up on the day. So the fact that I was there, and finished the event, was very satisfying.

The thing that left me somewhat disappointed was how AWFUL I felt nearly the whole race. On the physical side there were the cramps and nausea right from the start, and mentally I was hypervigilant about the other riders around me and fearful that I’d mess up on the technical features. When I finished I only felt relief, and no great desire to repeat the experience. After some time to reflect I became determined not to give in, not to let this beat me, and I had a strong sense that I needed to go back to Chicks in the Sticks this year with a new goal of finding enjoyment in the process of racing.

Feeling grossly underprepared this year through a lengthy series of “life events” (you can read about it here), I had little confidence in being able to ride long enough, hard enough and well enough. On arrival last Sunday I could feel my stomach churning and my inner voice telling me all the reasons why I couldn’t, shouldn’t, oughtn’t to be doing this.

This year I had a couple of friends doing Chicks in the Sticks with me and as we

walked around the event village and chatted, I could feel myself relaxing and finally looking forward to the race. And then we were off! I found the start of the race less congested than last year which helped me settle into a rhythm much quicker. I monitored my heart rate and slowed down whenever I noticed it getting too high. I sipped water at regular intervals. I was aware of myself in my surroundings and had confidence in my ability to pull to the side and let the faster riders go by without having to stop completely and then take off again. I also had confidence in passing slower riders when it seemed safe, and I chatted with other riders and marshals as we passed each other and joked with the photographers as they randomly appeared out of nowhere to capture that ever-so-flattering race face photo! I chose several B lines even though I knew I could ride the A lines. And I didn’t pay out on myself for my choices.

At the 2 hour mark I was ready to finish the race. The legs were burning and the saddle was making its presence felt. But I kept going for the full 3 hours and made a concerted effort to smile and chat even more. I sang to myself as I climbed the hills, and told myself how awesome I am as I floated over the technical features. I could feel myself riding strongly and confidently. I knew I could do it and it felt good to stay relaxed.

On my second last lap I had a quick stop for more water and felt a bit disturbed when another rider had a nasty fall. It could have been me. It could have been any of us. I rode more mindfully after that, knowing that I was getting tired and this is when accidents are more likely to occur. On my last lap I wriggled my right toes which had been feeling numb through the race and then the cramp struck me! Repeatedly! But I kept going and was able to laugh it off without falling off! Hmmm…. I thought ….. maybe I didn’t get my nutrition and hydration quite right! But I didn’t care. I hadn’t felt nauseous at all so I knew I’d done better than last year!

I breezed past the timer as I finished the race, feeling really good. In fact, elated! Wow that was so much fun! I’d ridden way better than I expected, not freaked out about the logs of death, the stairs, the steep gully, the log rollovers or the other riders. I knew I’d ridden smoothly, was aware of my limits, and had adjusted my riding to keep on keeping on. And best of all, I still had a smile on my face. Not a fake smile – it was a genuine smile from my heart. I’d actually had fun in a race! Who would believe it?

Progress can be measured in so many different ways. Stats can gauge our outcomes over time, but let’s remember that not everything shows up in the numbers. I’ve made a huge mental shift from 12 months ago even though I hadn’t prepared for this event. Yes, I improved my time over the same distance. But I also rode smoother. I could feel it. There was a sense of flow with my improved skill level which contributed to my confidence as well. And the fact that the element of FUN played a major role on the day says it all for me. If I can have fun at this thing called mountain biking, then I’m definitely dealing with those demons that hold me back in life. That’s what I call progress!

Mountain Biking is my Parallel Universe! (Part 1)

“Just relax!” The words are easily spoken ….. but how easy is it for you to do?

I seem to learn all sorts of lessons about life on my MTB and vice versa. I have some trouble relaxing at the best of times, and this is definitely evident on my bike as well. I hold my upper body quite tense. I’m easily spooked by rocks and sticks on the trail especially when the ground is dry and slippery like it has been this season until a couple of weeks ago when we got some beautiful rain that stuck the dust together. I get freaked out by tight corners and steep descents. All of these things are pretty common features on a trail ride so you can begin to imagine how tense I am by the end!

So lately I’ve been practising keeping my upper body more relaxed on my bike. I’ve especially been trying to increase my awareness of my body position on the easier green trails so that when I ride the more challenging trails, I’m better prepared because of all the practising. I think it’s not only helped me to handle the trails a bit better, but also helped my shoulder and chest injury, as well as helped me to relax a bit more in other areas of my life. What a bonus!

My MTB Experiment: on a mission to rediscover the joys of XC riding

My MTB journey has seen me learning to ride a bike as a child with next to no assistance or practice. I created stolen opportunities in my childhood to ride my older sister’s Malvern Star in the 1970’s, or my friend’s brother’s bike on the cul-de-sac where she lived. As a young teenager I got my hands on a second hand road bike which I took on a youth bike camp across the Lockyer Valley; I rode it on Guide ‘bike hikes’; and I laboured to ride it occasionally round the paddock where I lived in a fringe urban area that was once thriving farm land.

As a young adult I enjoyed riding my bike on the road and bike paths with my husband who was an experienced road and track cyclist. But the back and neck aches that followed made it difficult to stay motivated. Longingly I eyed off these new-fangled bikes with flat bars so you could ride in a more upright position. I was truly grateful for the new position and comfort that my new bike provided, and continued to ride on bike paths and quiet roads in my neighbourhood.

A few years gap between rides took place when I was a young mother. I didn’t feel comfortable having a baby strapped to the back of my bike, and I definitely felt far from stable or safe!

When I did finally get my bike out again, I was living in a rural area, and with no paved roads or bike paths in coo-ee, I found, quite shockingly, that it was really easy to fall off on bumpy ground, and to be covered in bruises all over. Jeepers! That put me off riding for a bit too!

Fast forward to middle age and the dilemma of continuing to be a ‘MTB widow’ vs suck up the courage and give it another go myself. Hmmmm, well it wasn’t easy and it still isn’t. But over time with support from my trusty team at home, I’ve stuck it out and have progressed my skills, confidence and enjoyment of cross country riding. I’ve discovered that having front suspension, a lighter frame, chunky tyre tread, a well-chosen saddle and good quality kit all contribute to the overall enjoyment of riding MTB.

This summer I’ve struggled to keep that spark burning. The past 12 months have seen me undertake some coaching sessions, overcome some of my fears about specific trail features, and I even entered in a couple of newbie races and went in a couple of group rides. I practised a lot and improved my fitness as well.

Then it got hot. Really hot. The flies and snakes came. I fell off a couple of times and lost a lot of skin, some blood, and most of my confidence. My son injured himself (not on a bike) and had to take a couple of months off riding, and my plans to get to the nearby trails a few times a week over the Christmas school holidays went AWOL.

Last weekend’s family ride was a good time to reflect on where I am on my MTB journey. Those voices in my head were telling me once again I’m always the slowest, least capable, most scared rider of the lot; that no matter how much I’ve ridden or how much I’ve practised over the last year, I’m still no better; and that I’m a burden on everyone who rides with me. Where’s the joy in that?! So you can see that the inevitable choice was made to give it up. What’s the point in continuing if you’re not enjoying yourself AND you spoil it for everyone else?

With misery came an empty feeling of letting myself down as well as my family who’ve encouraged and supported me in so many ways. Being with misery gave me space to reflect and hear and see things differently. There is so much I love about MTB but it seemed so far away.

As I went through the motions of watching a MTB video last night (I wasn’t really paying that much attention!) I heard a voice say that if you only get out on the trails a couple of times each week, then you’re not going to get better at riding.

LIGHTBULB MOMENT!

Of course, it’s pretty darn obvious isn’t it? Here I am giving myself such a hard time but really I’d only been riding a maximum of once a week for the past few months. I didn’t feel like I was enjoying it as much because my skills weren’t improving in addition to the other obstacles I’d faced – in fact it felt like I’d gone backwards. I felt like I wasn’t progressing because I wasn’t progressing, every ride felt difficult and I lost a big chunk of my inner fun each time.

So today I began the Great Experiment to test my hypothesis that by riding a few times a week, I’ll progress my skills and confidence, and I’ll rediscover the joys of MTB.

Our local trails are a long drive away, so I’m fortunate that my family has gradually been building our own mini-trail on our small rural property. I figure I can commit to a couple of practices around home each week as well as the longer family trail rides further afield on the weekends. I’ll document my experiences over the next few weeks on this blog and also by video. Stay tuned as a I embark on this new part of my MTB journey!