My MTB Experiment: Part 3

I’ve continued to ride my MTB several times a week for at least an hour since initiating My Great MTB Experiment. Weekend group and family rides have been longer, usually 3 hours or so.

And, so, HOW AM I DOING NOW after quite a few weeks of persisting with regular practice? Well, thanks for asking! Yes! I am enjoying myself much more than I thought I would after finding myself in a veritable mental rut as far as summer riding goes. Whilst the summer temperatures and associated challenges continued, they’ve been less problematic than before. Fewer flies, hot temperatures rather than searing temperatures, and riding on open tracks rather than overgrown ones have all helped me to persist with regular practice. All this in spite of the various injuries from falls off my bike! Riding is feeling smoother and I’ve even been getting up a bit earlier (occasionally) to squeeze the rides into my day.

As far as the mental challenge of enjoying myself, I’ve found it easier to hear my ENCOURAGING, SUPPORTIVE INNER VOICES and have found it easier to tune out from my inner critic. I’ve been MINDFUL of some of the smaller GAINS I’ve made which have collectively contributed to feelings of motivation. When I haven’t felt especially motivated I’ve tapped into my sense of COMMITMENT to myself (and this blog!) and to those I ride with. I’m focusing on PRACTICE, PRACTICE, PRACTICE and find myself looking forward to my rides and even …. (gasp!) … having FUN!

My plan is to keep the project rolling along with future updates to come! You can watch my video here:

My MTB Experiment: Part 2

So, The Great MTB Experiment has progressed through the first week ….. and how’s it going?

So far, I’ve managed to fall off my bike and get back up again with a few bruises and scrapes and a strained muscle in my chest. Nothing too bad really if you ignore the fact that I was aiming to improve my confidence through increasing my time on the bike!

And then there have been a couple of snakes, continuous heat for a couple of weeks in the high 30’s (deg C), and everyone everywhere is tired (including me).

But I’ve stuck at it and although I have questioned myself MANY times, and reasoned logically why I shouldn’t be bothered, I’ve kept my commitment. And so far I’m glad I have!

Have a listen here:

 

My MTB Experiment: on a mission to rediscover the joys of XC riding

My MTB journey has seen me learning to ride a bike as a child with next to no assistance or practice. I created stolen opportunities in my childhood to ride my older sister’s Malvern Star in the 1970’s, or my friend’s brother’s bike on the cul-de-sac where she lived. As a young teenager I got my hands on a second hand road bike which I took on a youth bike camp across the Lockyer Valley; I rode it on Guide ‘bike hikes’; and I laboured to ride it occasionally round the paddock where I lived in a fringe urban area that was once thriving farm land.

As a young adult I enjoyed riding my bike on the road and bike paths with my husband who was an experienced road and track cyclist. But the back and neck aches that followed made it difficult to stay motivated. Longingly I eyed off these new-fangled bikes with flat bars so you could ride in a more upright position. I was truly grateful for the new position and comfort that my new bike provided, and continued to ride on bike paths and quiet roads in my neighbourhood.

A few years gap between rides took place when I was a young mother. I didn’t feel comfortable having a baby strapped to the back of my bike, and I definitely felt far from stable or safe!

When I did finally get my bike out again, I was living in a rural area, and with no paved roads or bike paths in coo-ee, I found, quite shockingly, that it was really easy to fall off on bumpy ground, and to be covered in bruises all over. Jeepers! That put me off riding for a bit too!

Fast forward to middle age and the dilemma of continuing to be a ‘MTB widow’ vs suck up the courage and give it another go myself. Hmmmm, well it wasn’t easy and it still isn’t. But over time with support from my trusty team at home, I’ve stuck it out and have progressed my skills, confidence and enjoyment of cross country riding. I’ve discovered that having front suspension, a lighter frame, chunky tyre tread, a well-chosen saddle and good quality kit all contribute to the overall enjoyment of riding MTB.

This summer I’ve struggled to keep that spark burning. The past 12 months have seen me undertake some coaching sessions, overcome some of my fears about specific trail features, and I even entered in a couple of newbie races and went in a couple of group rides. I practised a lot and improved my fitness as well.

Then it got hot. Really hot. The flies and snakes came. I fell off a couple of times and lost a lot of skin, some blood, and most of my confidence. My son injured himself (not on a bike) and had to take a couple of months off riding, and my plans to get to the nearby trails a few times a week over the Christmas school holidays went AWOL.

Last weekend’s family ride was a good time to reflect on where I am on my MTB journey. Those voices in my head were telling me once again I’m always the slowest, least capable, most scared rider of the lot; that no matter how much I’ve ridden or how much I’ve practised over the last year, I’m still no better; and that I’m a burden on everyone who rides with me. Where’s the joy in that?! So you can see that the inevitable choice was made to give it up. What’s the point in continuing if you’re not enjoying yourself AND you spoil it for everyone else?

With misery came an empty feeling of letting myself down as well as my family who’ve encouraged and supported me in so many ways. Being with misery gave me space to reflect and hear and see things differently. There is so much I love about MTB but it seemed so far away.

As I went through the motions of watching a MTB video last night (I wasn’t really paying that much attention!) I heard a voice say that if you only get out on the trails a couple of times each week, then you’re not going to get better at riding.

LIGHTBULB MOMENT!

Of course, it’s pretty darn obvious isn’t it? Here I am giving myself such a hard time but really I’d only been riding a maximum of once a week for the past few months. I didn’t feel like I was enjoying it as much because my skills weren’t improving in addition to the other obstacles I’d faced – in fact it felt like I’d gone backwards. I felt like I wasn’t progressing because I wasn’t progressing, every ride felt difficult and I lost a big chunk of my inner fun each time.

So today I began the Great Experiment to test my hypothesis that by riding a few times a week, I’ll progress my skills and confidence, and I’ll rediscover the joys of MTB.

Our local trails are a long drive away, so I’m fortunate that my family has gradually been building our own mini-trail on our small rural property. I figure I can commit to a couple of practices around home each week as well as the longer family trail rides further afield on the weekends. I’ll document my experiences over the next few weeks on this blog and also by video. Stay tuned as a I embark on this new part of my MTB journey!

Summer Riding: learning from the flies, mozzies, heat, and snakes

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SUMMER ….. for many of my friends summer means beaches, swimming, ice creams and holidays. But for me, I associate summer with something different – flies, heat, mozzies, heat rash, snakes ….. did I mention the heat? And so far this summer there’s been an abundance of all the above!

MTB Bike Trail Fatigued from the heat of the day and the associated sleep disturbance through the night, I struggle to enjoy my mountain bike riding as usual. There’s a narrow time frame to get outside in order to avoid the oppressive heat. Yet even then it seems too hot, there are too many flies and mozzies, I still get heat rash all over (just like a baby, yes, including ….. well ….. including everywhere!) and there is the ever-present foreboding possibility of [GASP] snakes. Not just any snakes though. The snakes round this part of the world (Australia) are the deadliest on the planet, and in my little corner of the globe (Darling Downs, Queensland) they are more likely to be deadly than not!

So many worries, so many stresses, so many obstacles to keeping active in my summer time, so many internal voices directing me away from summer MTB and exercise in general. Too hot to eat. Too hot to sleep. Too hot to play. Too hot to be sociable. Bah humbug!

treeSitting down at home after a particularly hot day (it’s still over 30deg C at 7:30pm), I feel the faint breeze starting to work its magic, gently wafting through the windows, sharing its spirit and energy with me, re-energising and refreshing my body, mind and soul.

The sunset painted across the sky in pink and purple and orange reminds me of the varied and colourful world we share with billions of others on this planet, and that I am privileged for having shelter, clothing, food and clean water to drink.

Listening to the kookaburras calling to each other I can only imagine what stories they are sharing about their day. What story might I share from my day? A story of grumpiness and resentment? Or a story of gratitude and celebration of life?

The cicadas amplify their tune as darkness falls and I remember that there is so much more to this world than what I see at first glance and experience directly. Remember the little people, the little creatures, the unseen and unsong heroes, those without a voice in our society.

The stars and the moon come out to play as the evening cools off. Maybe this is my time to play too. How can I use the cool of the day better? And how can I make better make use of my time during the searing heat?

I hear a menagerie of other wildlife settling down for the night, or beginning their nightly rounds. How would it be to organise my life more in tune with the natural systems and patterns of the world around me?

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I remind myself I have so much more to learn about life and myself. By tuning into my personal experience of summer, I can find lessons that will teach me patience, tolerance, acceptance and compassion.

I can acknowledge my internal voices that convincingly tell me I ‘should’ be able to control my environment and my reactions better, that I haven’t achieved anything worthwhile today, and that my level of frustration and annoyance reflects the injustice of the summer conditions.

Summer riding (or not riding as the case may be) gives me the opportunity to learn about what matters most, what I can legitimately control and influence, the importance of pacing myself and being in tune with my inner and outer worlds, and learning to choose more wisely which of my inner voices I’ll listen to today.

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Logo 2 shorter hairSo tomorrow, with temperatures forecast at 37deg C (again), I choose something different. I choose to stay indoors to do core strength training (something I tend to neglect anyway!) instead of riding outdoors. I’ll have the fans on and a bottle of icy water beside me. No snakes. No mozzies. No flies. And the heat …. well there isn’t much I can do to control the weather, but some of my choices can make that somewhat less of a problem. I choose to be grateful for the choices I DO have, and to make the most of them. BUT ….. I expect that sometimes I’ll need reminding about that again! 

Spring Cleaning My Life

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Why wait for spring??? Spring cleaning can happen at any time of the year! I love the feeling associated with cleaning out the house, office and car, de-cluttering my environment, and letting go of those things that have accumulated over the past months, year, or longer. This action of making space also adds to my sense of renewal, of making a fresh start. And it’s energising and satisfying.

Spring cleaning contributes to a sense of order, healthy attachment, and organisation. It gives us renewed energy, like a gentle breeze on a hot day. We’ve cleaned out the cobwebs and feel fresh and clean again.

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And it’s not only our houses, gardens, offices and cars that need regular spring cleaning. Our minds need de-cluttering from time to time too. We can unpack our inner lives, re-organise our thoughts and attitudes, simplify our lives, and reach a new understanding of everything and everyone around us, including ourselves.

A great way to de-clutter the mind is through regular exercise – running, boxing, swimming, cycling, and so on. Some people find it beneficial to spend time alone gardening, listening to music, painting, reading, meditating or simply ‘being’. Even spring cleaning the house can be a fantastic way to clear the cobwebs of the mind!

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What works for you? How do you de-clutter your life, your mind, your surroundings?

Logo 2 shorter hairRemember …. no matter what the season, there is always an opportunity and many benefits to spring cleaning!

Left and right handedness: inner control issues of a mountain biker

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As a self-confessed strongly right-side dominated person, I have had my challenges on the trickier, more technical sections of trail rides. My right foot LOVES to step off my bike first. Anything else simply feels totally unnatural. But this urge doesn’t always serve me well. Take for example the many times I’ve come to a stop on a narrow trail with an obstacle in front of me, a rocky wall on my left side, and a sheer drop-off on my right. Let the image come to your mind, and you will see both the fear in my face and the ridiculousness of my bodily action as I desperately try to balance on …. well, nothing! and clutch at anything to stop the inevitable fall and slide, grazes and prickles.

Even learning to move my weight around on my bike has been a challenge in some respects. For general balance I have no issues, but when it comes to finely tuning the coordination of my left and right sides to safely negotiate tight switchbacks, I feel pretty awkward. Weighting and unweighting my left and right hands has been a journey into tough neurological territory. I’ve spent hours practising drills, telling my left side what to do over and again, with pretty slow progress.

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When you stop to think about it, our whole lives are about control issues. As babies, we begin the process of learning to control our bodies from a seemingly simple movement of the hand, shaking and jerking in what appears to be a random fashion, gaining greater control over our gross motor and fine motor skills with practice. Learning control of bodily functions like toileting and speech. Learning to balance on two legs instead of four, most of us then progress towards running, hopping, jumping. Learning to coordinate our mouths and hands to eat with a degree of gentility. Learning to regulate emotions and behaviours. And the most wondrous of joys – learning to balance on a bicycle with just two wheels!

By this stage of life most of us have a preference for using the right or left side of our bodies. As adults we’ve had many years of practice doing things with the same dominance. Some people I know have had injuries that have necessitated learning to use their less dominant side. Watching my son gain competent use of his non-dominant side over several months as he recovered from a complicated break in his elbow inspired me to teach myself some new tricks, like playing sport left-handed and winding the clothes-line up and down with my left hand. The knowledge that our brains have a degree of plasticity gives me hope that on my bike I can, and will, gradually develop skills that will improve my riding, confidence and enjoyment.

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Practising is something that I do a lot but I still find it hard. Getting my brain and my left side talking to each other is not something that comes naturally to me and it can be very frustrating. Over time I’ve come to realise that instead of messaging my left side a list of instructions, it’s actually more helpful to simply tell my right side to back off. This leaves space for my left side to do what it already knows, albeit a bit slower. The scenario reminds me of a child whose sibling / parent / friend does everything for them because it’s quicker and easier, and although often done with a loving intent, it prevents the child from developing the skills themselves.

Sitting back and observing the process, I can see these sorts of control issues mirrored in other areas of my life. To facilitate growth, it’s sometimes helpful to cut back, cut off or put firm boundaries up around a part of ourselves or our lives – give space to those parts of ourselves that need space; give time to those parts of ourselves that need time. And with practice, this gets easier too!

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“Be Prepared” to learn anything!

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Be prepared” – a familiar and valuable motto in life that I first came to know through my involvement in the Guiding and Scouting movements as a young person. Little did I know back then that as an adult I would still be learning lessons based on those 2 simple words.

After signing up for my very first mountain bike event recently, I threw myself into Preparation Phase. I knew I had my work cut out for me to get race-ready. I was worried about being incompetent on the course, exhausted before the end of the event, and scared of the technical sections and the race experience in general. But … I was up for the challenge and immersed myself in a process which smoothed the path and built up layers of skill, excitement and confidence.

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My preparation plan was more than a physical training plan. Sure, it included some much needed skills training and practice, enduran ce training, trialling nutrition options, and ensuring plenty of hydration and sleep in the lead up to the event. However, being aware that my mental preparation was also in dire need of attention (note the above references to being worried and scared!), I had a serious examination of my inner voices, then developed a plan to optimise them. I wanted my head to work for me not against me. My experience with mountain biking so far had highlighted just how critical and limiting I can be towards myself and this was definitely not helpful at all. I needed to find a way to deal with that before I could even get myself onto a race course – literally!

So, my mental preparation plan included:

  • Learning to speak to myself in encouraging ways
  • Developing a growth mind set (the modern term for having an attitude of flexibility, openness, readiness to learn, readiness to ask questions as opposed to a closed mindset in which skills are considered innate)
  • Challenging my urge to perfectly accomplish any task I attempt the first time and to implement my skills in persistence instead
  • Setting a race goal for myself that is aligned with my values and conducive to a constructive mindset
  • Getting out of my comfort zone to ask people questions about the event, technical skills training, physical training tips, nutrition, hydration etc etc
  • Reading forums and articles about women’s cycling, women’s MTB events and races, newbie racing, and dealing with race day nerves.

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I discovered that:

  • I can, in fact, make choices about which inner voices I listen to
  • I have the capacity to persist, practise, learn and improve
  • People enjoy sharing their knowledge and skills with others
  • I can ask questions, be heard and understood
  • Goals don’t have to be outcomes-based – I can choose to focus on the process and experience instead
  • Just about everyone else has a story to tell about being scared, worried and feeling unprepared for racing

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So thanks Baden Powell for giving me such a great childhood foundation to build upon as an adult. I’m inspired to reflect how much I’ve learnt from what seems like a simple process of preparing for a race, but in fact goes well beyond that into all areas of my life. Bring on the next challenge! I’m prepared to discover new, exciting and surprising ways in which I can continue to learn and grow in life!

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Having a Crack at Chicks in the Sticks

Daisy Field

Have you watched “The Croods”? If not, do yourself a favour and watch this exciting, inspiring family movie starring the voice talent of Emma Stone. The Croods are a cave family living in prehistoric times relying on their sense of fear to keep themselves protected, safe and sound, cocooned in their little familiar world, and avoidant of any risk or danger that might jeopardise their lives. In short, fear has kept them alive. But it has also kept them confined; inhibiting individual family members from living their lives to the full.

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In many ways I’ve lived much of my life like the Croods. Fear has long been my ally signalling danger with a blast of adrenaline and cortisol surging through my body and subsequently bringing with it great waves of nausea, muscle tension, sleeplessness, hyper alertness and fatigue. Fear has kept me safe from many dangers and it has also kept me small in some ways, becoming an obstacle to achieving some of my dreams.

Getting up ‘close and personal’ to your fear is the first step towards reaping its benefits whilst simultaneously learning how to keep it in its place. Throughout my own journey to uncover the true nature of my innermost fears, my eyes were opened to its duality. On the one hand fear has a protective, almost loveable quality, and on the other hand shows characteristics of being a bully by giving voice to my harsh inner critic – self-deprecating and self-defeating. Not wishing to succumb to the tactics of an overprotective ally or an inner bully, I have made conscious choices to work towards my dreams despite what my fears tell me.

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My mountain bike escapades have taken on a new dimension since I made this commitment to myself. I have always shrunk away from the idea of racing because I know I wouldn’t be able to keep up the pace, I don’t have the technical skills, I would get in everyone else’s way, I would probably hurt myself and possibly the rest of the field too, I wouldn’t cope with the heat, my butt would get too sore, I would panic and do something ridiculous like crash on the start line, I would feel miserable ………

KW Helmet

One day recently I made the decision to take action against these fears. I quickly registered for an MTB event before the volume of my inner voice increased any more. “Chicks in the Sticks” is promoted as a women’s only 3 hour enduro event that will ease me into the world of mountain bike racing. The forums are all so positive, the photos full of smiles and camaraderie, and best of all, the grading categories speak the language of newbies like me! I’ve entered “Have a crack” specially for those of us with no prior race experience but simply wanting to have a go.

Chicks in the Sticks

I’m sure my fears will continue to challenge my decision to register, but for now I’m feeling excited! Excited because I’m having a go at something that I thought I probably wouldn’t ever have the guts to do, excited because I’m standing up to my fears, and excited to be part of a community of women who ‘get’ where my confidence is at.

So here I am with only a few weeks to go before the big day! My ‘very-informal-training’ has included going on longer family weekend rides and bringing a greater degree of intensity and variety to my weekday exercise. And I am absolutely loving it! I’ve booked in for some coaching prior to the event to become familiar with the trail and improve my skills to ride the more technical sections. Each of these actions brings new evidence that I CAN do it, and that I WILL do it.

MTB Bike Trail

As the Croods and myself have learned, avoiding everything you fear might keep you hanging on for dear life, but it isn’t much fun. It’s claustrophobic and confining. Life has no variety and risks the disappointment of unfulfilled dreams. By confronting those things we fear, we find new ways of being and doing, and it can open up a whole new world!

5 Things I’ve Learned About Life Through Mountain Biking

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe was an unexpected bonus to the fresh air, exercise and family time that initially motivated me to jump on my bike and get into the great Australian bush. Over the past few years I’ve managed to improve my riding skills somewhat, but what I’ve truly learned is much, much bigger than how to keep the rubber side down! Here I would like to share with you some of the lessons I’ve learned about life through mountain biking.

Daisy Field

1. Look where you want to go

When you focus your attention on something right in front of you, it immediately becomes an obstacle between yourself and your end goal. On a mountain bike this might be a rock, tree root, or a deep rut in the track. You can be guaranteed as soon as you fix your attention on it, well ….. that’s where you’ll go! The trick is to acknowledge the presence of the obstacle but stay most attentive to the line you actually want to take. It’s the same in life generally. It’s so easy to get caught up in the distractions around us, the bumps and hiccups in our day, and to lose sight of our end goal. It’s so easy to give up when those unexpected obstacles get in our way. But this lesson is a keeper! Keep your eyes looking where you WANT to go.

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2. Lean into what you most fear

So much of mountain biking seems counter-intuitive to me. My inner child has a strong survival instinct and tells me loud and clear that if something looks dangerous, I should get as far away from it as I can. And so it happens that learning various MTB skills such as cornering and negotiating steep descents has been a big challenge for me. Leaning into the curve and getting closer to the (very hard rocky) ground that’s whizzing past just doesn’t seem to make sense. Yet it works time and time again! Acknowledging and then leaning into other things we fear in life can be likewise empowering – going to learn-to-swim classes as an adult to deal with a fear of water, accepting a work role that will extend your skills beyond your self-belief, or even going shopping alone. We all have fears and we all have the opportunity of experiencing the sensation of empowerment that comes when we confront and lean into them instead of running away from them.

3. Going slow is okay

I’m pretty much a slow-poke on my MTB. At least I am when it comes to going downhill or over the technical terrain. I’ve been very hard on myself at times for not being able to keep up with others, especially when I’ve practised hard and haven’t seen any significant improvement. But do you know what I’ve learned? ‘Fast’ is not superior to ‘not the fastest’ (unless you’re in serious racemode of course!). But really, when it comes down to it, what actually makes ‘fast’ such a desirable state of being in our society? Giving myself permission to go at my own pace whether it’s on my bike, swimming at the pool, or working on a project, seems to help me focus on moment-to-moment enjoyment which truly enriches my life. Going slow, or slower, or at my own pace, does not equate with failure or being deficient in anyway. Slowing down other parts of my life helps me to meaningfully engage with those things and those people that matter the most to me.

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4. Take a break when you need it

All-out fast paced riding up hills, down rocky terrain, winding through bush trails, dodging tree roots, negotiating loose rocks, squeezing between trees – it’s exhausting work for the body and mind! There’s always that one person, you know them …… the eternal chatterbox ….. who seems to be able to keep nattering on endlessly and cheerfully and looks surprised when you don’t answer because OH MY GOSH ….. my heart rate has been sitting on 172 for the past 10 minutes, my heart feels like it’s going to burst out of my chest, and my head is so light it feels like it’s going to float away! I need a break! And even if the rest of you don’t, I’ve learnt from past experience to speak up and express my needs otherwise I’m likely to run out of fuel before we get to the end. Same in life – anything and anyone runs smoother and more efficiently given time to rest and collect. Listen to your mind and body – do what you need to in order to get it done. It’s not a weakness to have a break, and in fact, others will probably be secretly very thankful!

5. Practice, practice, practice

As a child and younger adult, there were many things that seemed to come naturally to me. Anything that I couldn’t do pretty well the first time I tried it, well … basically I didn’t bother too much about it again. I never really learned much about persistence when the going got tough! I don’t recall anyone teaching me to ride a bike. It’s one of those things that seemed to come naturally. However, MTB is vastly different to riding on a road or concrete path or even your average back yard. The techniques and skills required to safely negotiate the rough and often narrow terrain of single track have often seemed insurmountable to me, the middle-aged female trying to prove her worth. So, with humility, I’ve learnt that I can practise and persist at practising, and then practise some more. And eventually, gradually I learn new skills. I figure there’s a heck of a lot of brain-rewiring going on up there as I try, retry and try again, day after day after day, and then still needing lots more practice to get it right. In my work life, this lesson of persisting and practising has enabled me to implement some much needed changes that would otherwise have never happened.

These are my first life lessons learned through mountain biking, but they are not my last. I continue to learn and grow as a rider and as a human being. Watch out for my upcoming article “Another 5 Things I’ve Learned About Life Through Mountain Biking”.

Daisy Field