Time Management: Stay sane when time is your enemy

Juggling the many roles and responsibilities we have can be a constant source of both satisfaction and despair. I talk to women every week about challenges like time management, and wanted to share some of the ideas that I’ve collected on how to stay sane when time seems to be your enemy.

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TIME! We never seem to have enough of it, we’re always fighting it, and it’s invisible! It seems to slip through our fingers without care. It’s like an elusive double agent, tempting us with tantalising pleasures, and then it’s gone, leaving us with nothing but a pile of to-do’s and deadlines in its wake. And if we’re honest with ourselves, we’ll always find something to fill in a space that’s left when we are more efficient with our time – there’ll never be enough of it!

Time Management is a real thing!

Managing the time we have available to us is a learned skill and one that we can continually refine as our needs, activities and priorities change. There are a lot of self-help books on this topic, but honestly, who has the time to read them! Assuming you’re in the same boat as me, I’ve short-listed some key time management strategies and helpful mindsets that I’ve collected over the years.

time management clock

Time management strategies to stay sane when it feels like time is your enemy

1. Time is a commodity we exchange for something else

Time is a precious commodity that I give in exchange for something else. It’s a transaction; a business deal between myself and the universe. If I spend lots of money on luxury items, eating out, holidays and new clothes, I may not (ummm ….. actually I won’t) have enough left over for the basic household bills like groceries, fuel for the car, and electricity. Time is like money – think about how you can spend it wisely!

2. We have a choice

We have choices about how we spend our time, in the same way that we have choices about spending our money. What choices are you making?

3. Get your priorities straight

Time Management Matrix
Stephen Covey’s Time Management Matrix

With so many different things competing for our time and energy, we are constantly needing to prioritise. And I mean constantly! It’s an ongoing process. Everyday – prioritise. Every hour – prioritise. Every minute – prioritise. Every moment – prioritise. It’s a valuable skill – the more practise you get, the better you’ll become at getting your priorities straight.

If you have trouble identifying what’s most important and what’s most urgent, invest just a few minutes of your time reading about Stephen Covey’s Time Management Matrix here

4. Time is precious

Time can never be refunded once it’s spent. Thinking of time as precious gift to be treasured and used wisely can help us to make carefully considered choices about how we are using it.

5. What are your time vampires?

What is it that sucks the time out of your day? Where does your time go? Are you okay about this?

6. Record your actions for a day, or longer!

I’ve found this really helpful at times. You can make a note in your diary or notepad of how you are spending your day. Note down the time and what task or activity you are working on, and what time you finished. Or you could break your diary into 10 or 15 minute time blocks and make a note of what you are doing at every time interval. It only takes a teeny bit of time to do this, but the investment is well worthwhile! These actions can highlight where our time goes, and keeps us more accountable to our goals.

7. Ask yourself “What am I doing now?”

This precious moment is all we have. How are you spending your energy and time right now, in this precious moment?

8. Don’t make excuses

It’s easy to blame other people and situations for our poverty of time. Do a thorough audit and be honest with yourself. What can you take responsibility for? What change can you make?

9. Avoid distractions

Is distraction an issue for you?

  • Set a timer to go off at regular intervals to remind you to refocus your attention
  • Switch off your wi-fi
  • Close your door
  • Turn off your phone
  • Put a “Do Not Disturb” sign on your office
  • Reward yourself when you’ve completed tasks

. whatever you need, just do it. Make it as easy as possible to keep your attention laser-focused.

Let's sum up!

Make friends with the time you have!

  • Time is a commodity – spend it wisely!
  • You choose moment to moment how you spend you time
  • Get your priorities straight – is it important / urgent?
  • Time is precious
  • What are your time vampires?
  • Record how you spend your time
  • Ask yourself “What am I doing now?”
  • Don’t make excuses
  • Avoid distractions

I’d love to hear any other time management strategies you use to stay sane when it feels like time is your enemy. Leave your comment below, send me a message, or head on over to my Facebook!

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Daisy Spoke aka Kathryn Walton logoKathryn Walton shares information and reflections in Daisy Spoke that connect, inspire and self-empower women to make healthy choices for themselves. She integrates her love of physical exercise, family, nature, gardening and creative arts with her professional background in mental health social work to facilitate change with individuals, groups and communities of women who are committed to living life to the full. 

 

Frights, Flights, and Fears: Look back to see how far you’ve come

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Life can hand us plenty of frights, flights and fears but it’s good to look back occasionally to see how far you’ve come. I’ve been reflecting on this over the weekend when I noticed some old fears resurfacing, and rather than get caught up in the stories they told me, I chose to look at how far I’ve progressed.

I was eager to get back on my mountain bike after a couple of weeks away road tripping, bushwalking and trail running which I absolutely loved, but I also love riding my bike and Kathryn on MTB riding through a gullywas missing it. When I started riding on the weekend, I noticed some of those old worries pop up that only surface when I’ve been off my bike for a while. They used to hang around me a lot. Well actually, most of the time! But I’ve worked really hard at keeping them in their place in recent years. Deciding to blog about them has been one of the most empowering actions I’ve taken. They could no longer lurk away in the dark depths of my mind, stewing and multiplying and expanding by the minute. Many of them simply lost their power when I brought them out into the light of day. Have you read my blog about how I worked through a step-by-step process to manage my fear of “the scary corner”!

So here I was on Sunday morning with an incessant barrage of inner talk going on in my head:

“That’s too slippery.”

“I can’t ride down that gully.”

I’m going to hit that tree.”

I’m hopeless at riding on ‘technical’ terrain.”

My back tyre keeps slipping out. I can’t ride up here.”

There are too many rocks.”

There are too many low hanging branches.”

I have to go slowly round this corner so I don’t fall off.”

I’d better walk this bit.”

That’s where I fell before.”

That’s another place I fell off.”

That’s where I nearly fell on the snake when I stopped too quickly and went over the handlebars.”

..and so on and so on. It was very loud in my head!

NOW I want to say that the most powerful step YOU can take if you find yourself in a similar situation is simply this: NOTICE what’s going on in your head. Simply NOTICE. The situation doesn’t’ have to be about riding a bike. It might be the thoughts you have associated with speaking to an audience, introducing yourself to someone, going out in the dark, driving in the city traffic, swimming with sharks, flying on a plane, or absolutely anything at all! Simply NOTICE what your mind says. And with the power of noticing what’s going on in your head, you can then choose what to do next.

Kathryn looking calm and happy on her rideI’ve been practising and teaching this technique for a lot of years, and yet still I sometimes forget to do it when the moment arises. The thing is that on Sunday morning I DID NOTICE those fearful thoughts bouncing round my head. And guess what? I didn’t care about them. I didn’t let them bother me. Instead of giving them the power of my attention and allowing them to expand and bully me into playing it too safe, I chose to dig up another thought from my mind vault:

This is a confidence cycle. I only worry about these things when I’ve been off my bike for a couple of weeks and out of practice. Just ride. Focus on how far you’ve come over the past few years. Don’t let those worries bully you or keep you small, or limit the fun you’ll have today. You’re sensible. You won’t do any crazy dangerous stuff. You’re safe. Just ride.”

And so I focused on how strong I felt and that all the recent running has made a positive difference to my strength and aerobic fitness. I enjoyed the feeling of sprinting up a couple "Tough Girl" socksof short hills engaging my quads in an exertion that a couple of years ago would have been painful (if not impossible)! I pedalled in a higher gear than normal and found it easier than expected. I noticed what I did well and trusted wholeheartedly that my confidence will be back real soon. I glanced down at my fabulous new “tough girl” socks reminding myself of my strengths and the stories I can tell myself about what I CAN do. And as I looked back over the past few years, I could see how far I’ve progressed in managing my fears on the bike. I’ve developed resilience and practised some of life’s most valuable skills that I’ve transferred into other areas of my life.

Yes, frights, flights and fears will always be there, but you can choose how to handle them. Practise. Persist. And occasionally look back to see how far you’ve come.

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Daisy Spoke aka Kathryn Walton logoKathryn Walton shares information and reflections in Daisy Spoke that connect, inspire and self-empower women to make healthy choices for themselves. She integrates her love of physical exercise, family, nature, gardening and creative arts with her professional background in mental health social work to facilitate change with individuals, groups and communities of women who are committed to living life to the full. 

3 Things I Wish I’d Known When I Was Younger

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Do you know what drives me to do the work I do with groups of women and health professionals? It’s the fact that there are so many things I wish I’d known when I was younger – things that could have made a difference to my life and to my happiness if I’d known about them, made sense of them, and felt confident implementing them in my own life.

Being stuck in anxiety, sadness or anger stops many people from living truly satisfying and fulfilling lives. With many years of working in the mental health industry as well my own personal experiences, I feel an unstoppable drive to keep moving forwards, to keep expanding my reach to build up people’s knowledge and skills, to make a difference in the world with as many people as I can. My mission is to share information and inspiration that empowers women towards a genuine and deep sense of wellness. And by doing this the ripple effect will have an even greater impact.

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Today I’m sharing with you 3 things I wish I’d known when I was younger.

1. Exercise is the only magic pill

KW MTB selfieDaily exercise and general physical activity are crucial elements of feeling good. Just as some people might need to diligently take medication every day, I need to exercise every day. Exercise is nature’s way of stimulating the hormones which aid concentration, problem-solving, sleep, digestion, and mood. This daily dose of exercise rebalances our body’s systems resulting in wide-ranging benefits that no single medication can provide. The research is absolutely clear that regular medium to high intensity exercise can have a profound effect on health AND happiness.

What types of physical activity and exercise do you prefer? I’ve always loved bushwalking, and in more recent years I’ve become really enthusiastic about mountain biking. I call mountain biking my ‘parallel universe’ because it not only provides me with a very regular dose of fun exercise, family time and social interaction, but I’ve also learned the most amazing life lessons from it including managing fears, growing resilience, and developing mindfulness.

2. Get sleep savvy

Awake owl
Credit: source unknown

Sleep is vital for optimal brain function including mood management. Quality sleep restores the mind and body. It improves concentration, problem-solving, reaction time, capacity to think clearly, organise ourselves, plan, learn … and the list just goes on. But getting a good sleep is easier said than done for some of us. There are many skills to getting a good sleep and there are many things you can control when you understand how sleep works. So, the lesson here is to educate yourself about sleep – sleep cycles, circadian rhythms, body clocks, and sleep hygiene. The most common helpful strategies include exercise (especially in the morning), exposure to early morning light (this resets the body clock so you start to feel sleepy in the evening), reduce caffeine (especially in the afternoon) and learn relaxation and stress management skills. Another vital strategy here is to learn about AND practice mindfulness – every day (not just when you have trouble sleeping). Which leads straight into my 3rd tip!

3. Mind your mind

Don't believe everything you thinkMinds are such complex things! They wield a lot of power over our emotions and our actions (including sleep). But unless you notice what’s going on in your mind, and choose how much power to give it, your thoughts, assumptions and beliefs will control you instead of the other way around. The habit of being hooked by thoughts or strongly attached to them is limiting and anxiety-provoking. The key here is to begin by simply noticing what is happening in your mind, and by doing this with curiosity and without judgement. The power is in the noticing. You’ll collect all sorts of interesting bits of information about how your mind works, what thinking patterns it gets locked into, what beliefs and assumptions are behind it all, and how all of this impacts your physiology, your behaviours and your emotions. One of my favourite sayings is “Don’t believe everything you think!” because we can learn to stand back, notice the thought and choose whether to believe it, or not.

Let's sum up!

So there you have it. The 3 key pieces of information I wish I’d known (and understood, and implemented) when I was younger!

1. Exercise is the only magic pill

2. Get sleep savvy

3. Mind your mind

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Daisy Spoke aka Kathryn Walton logoKathryn Walton shares information and reflections in Daisy Spoke that connect, inspire and self-empower women to make healthy choices for themselves. She integrates her love of physical exercise, family, nature, gardening and creative arts with her professional background in mental health social work to facilitate change with individuals, groups and communities of women who are committed to living life to the full.

Metamorphosis: change is on the way!

Many animals and plants go through periods of rapid and remarkable change: caterpillars morph into butterflies, stone-like seeds generate lush green shoots.

There are infinite examples of other animal and plant changes that are no less remarkable, but perhaps more gradual over time, so the effect may not be as dramatic to the eye: kittens grow into adult cats, seedlings grow into trees.

The inner world of the human is also subject to transformation over time. This is a more abstract concept, but very real and can have a profound impact on the individual and others around them.

Organisations also experience change. We often associate this with unwelcome change such as restructures and redundancies.

Being a small business owner in a regional town for over 12 years, I’ve experienced the effect of many changes in our society including drought, flood, the global financial crisis, government policy changes and a decline in my local economy. I have adapted my business routines, structures, services and systems to meet the changing needs of my community and family.

And NOW I am stepping forward to initiate a NEW and exciting CHANGE! ….. A TRANSFORMATION…… A METAMORPHOSIS. I’m incredibly excited about this change! It’s the next step on my journey of MAKING A DIFFERENCE to my world and making a difference to the lives of many individuals.

 

I’ll shortly be announcing the LAUNCH of my NEW WEBSITE and rolling out my transformational NEW OFFERS including online courses, workshop packages, speaking services and FREE downloads! You’ll have access to the best current evidence-based information about health and wellbeing. You’ll be offered opportunities to be INSPIRED and EMPOWERED on your own wellness journey, as well as events and resources to support YOU as you support OTHERS in your work environment and personal life.

STAY TUNED for all the details as 2017 draws to a close, and JOIN WITH ME as the new year UNFOLDS offering us the next part of our journey in life.

(And remember! You can follow me on Facebook and Instagram too!)

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections in Daisy Spoke that connect, inspire and self-empower women to make healthy choices for themselves.

Thinking About Thinking: the barbed nature of thoughts

Thinking about thinking is pretty hard work. It’s a fairly abstract concept so I find it helpful to use imagery and metaphors to grasp some of the concepts that are so important to a healthy mind and body.

Thoughts are a little bit like a fish hook with barbs on it. We can very easily get hooked by our thoughts, reeled in and immersed in an ever-expanding fantasy that leaves us feeling upset, excited, worried, distressed or something else. The hooking nature of thought is very powerful.

When our mind throws out a line with a barbed hook at the end, that’s our thought, we often don’t even realise that we’ve grabbed hold of it. We can become firmly attached to it and we can have difficulty letting it go. We can find ourselves stuck, squirming and wriggling with the discomfort just as a fish does as it’s reeled in from the water.

But how do we stop ourselves getting hooked in the first place? And if we do get hooked, how can we free ourselves from those thoughts that leave us feeling really uncomfortable? How do we know which thoughts to let go of, and which ones to hold onto?

Daily practice of simply noticing your thoughts as they arise during an activity helps to train your brain to notice thoughts arising at other times, and to notice that they are simply thoughts or mental events. If you find the fish hook imagery useful, you can notice the hooks (or thoughts) being cast out, and you can notice which hooks (or thoughts) you cling on to.

When you notice that you’ve been hooked into a story of your mind that’s unhelpful and is keeping you stuck and struggling, picture yourself carefully prising the thought or the hook away. As you gently and carefully extract yourself from the barbs, perceiving the thought as a small but powerful hook that is separate to you, you’ll be able to lovingly let go of it, thank it for its care and concern in your life, and set yourself free.

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections in Daisy Spoke that connect, inspire and self-empower women to make healthy choices for themselves.

Mountain Biking is my Parallel Universe! (Part 1)

“Just relax!” The words are easily spoken ….. but how easy is it for you to do?

I seem to learn all sorts of lessons about life on my MTB and vice versa. I have some trouble relaxing at the best of times, and this is definitely evident on my bike as well. I hold my upper body quite tense. I’m easily spooked by rocks and sticks on the trail especially when the ground is dry and slippery like it has been this season until a couple of weeks ago when we got some beautiful rain that stuck the dust together. I get freaked out by tight corners and steep descents. All of these things are pretty common features on a trail ride so you can begin to imagine how tense I am by the end!

So lately I’ve been practising keeping my upper body more relaxed on my bike. I’ve especially been trying to increase my awareness of my body position on the easier green trails so that when I ride the more challenging trails, I’m better prepared because of all the practising. I think it’s not only helped me to handle the trails a bit better, but also helped my shoulder and chest injury, as well as helped me to relax a bit more in other areas of my life. What a bonus!

 

Women Empowered: Life Without Limits

“Life Without Limits” is the first Women Empowered retreat for 2017 being held in Warwick on the Southern Darling Downs on Saturday 25th February.

This tranquil day of RETREAT will have Kathryn Walton guiding a small group of women through reflections, discussions and creative activities as we explore the perceptions and experiences of  barriers, obstacles, restrictions and limitations in our lives. Identifying and acknowledging these issues is a step towards EMPOWERING ourselves to step into the LIFE we want to live, the ATTITUDE we want to be living with, and the very real POSSIBILITIES this opens up for us. We want to do more than survive – WE WANT TO THRIVE!

By taking time for your own self-care, you will be modelling effective life strategies to your family, colleagues and the wider community of women AND men AND children. Remember, you can claim a 10% DISCOUNT when you register with a friend!

Refreshments, a delicious morning tea, and workshop materials will be supplied for participants. In order to keep costs as low as possible, please BYO lunch. Refrigeration is available, as well as crockery and cutlery.

So ….. are you ready to LIVE a LIFE without limits? Information and registration is available on the link below, or email me for more information 🙂

https://www.trybooking.com/ONZJ

kwalton@condamineassist.com.au

Having a Crack at Chicks in the Sticks

Daisy Field

Have you watched “The Croods”? If not, do yourself a favour and watch this exciting, inspiring family movie starring the voice talent of Emma Stone. The Croods are a cave family living in prehistoric times relying on their sense of fear to keep themselves protected, safe and sound, cocooned in their little familiar world, and avoidant of any risk or danger that might jeopardise their lives. In short, fear has kept them alive. But it has also kept them confined; inhibiting individual family members from living their lives to the full.

TheCroodsCropped

In many ways I’ve lived much of my life like the Croods. Fear has long been my ally signalling danger with a blast of adrenaline and cortisol surging through my body and subsequently bringing with it great waves of nausea, muscle tension, sleeplessness, hyper alertness and fatigue. Fear has kept me safe from many dangers and it has also kept me small in some ways, becoming an obstacle to achieving some of my dreams.

Getting up ‘close and personal’ to your fear is the first step towards reaping its benefits whilst simultaneously learning how to keep it in its place. Throughout my own journey to uncover the true nature of my innermost fears, my eyes were opened to its duality. On the one hand fear has a protective, almost loveable quality, and on the other hand shows characteristics of being a bully by giving voice to my harsh inner critic – self-deprecating and self-defeating. Not wishing to succumb to the tactics of an overprotective ally or an inner bully, I have made conscious choices to work towards my dreams despite what my fears tell me.

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My mountain bike escapades have taken on a new dimension since I made this commitment to myself. I have always shrunk away from the idea of racing because I know I wouldn’t be able to keep up the pace, I don’t have the technical skills, I would get in everyone else’s way, I would probably hurt myself and possibly the rest of the field too, I wouldn’t cope with the heat, my butt would get too sore, I would panic and do something ridiculous like crash on the start line, I would feel miserable ………

KW Helmet

One day recently I made the decision to take action against these fears. I quickly registered for an MTB event before the volume of my inner voice increased any more. “Chicks in the Sticks” is promoted as a women’s only 3 hour enduro event that will ease me into the world of mountain bike racing. The forums are all so positive, the photos full of smiles and camaraderie, and best of all, the grading categories speak the language of newbies like me! I’ve entered “Have a crack” specially for those of us with no prior race experience but simply wanting to have a go.

Chicks in the Sticks

I’m sure my fears will continue to challenge my decision to register, but for now I’m feeling excited! Excited because I’m having a go at something that I thought I probably wouldn’t ever have the guts to do, excited because I’m standing up to my fears, and excited to be part of a community of women who ‘get’ where my confidence is at.

So here I am with only a few weeks to go before the big day! My ‘very-informal-training’ has included going on longer family weekend rides and bringing a greater degree of intensity and variety to my weekday exercise. And I am absolutely loving it! I’ve booked in for some coaching prior to the event to become familiar with the trail and improve my skills to ride the more technical sections. Each of these actions brings new evidence that I CAN do it, and that I WILL do it.

MTB Bike Trail

As the Croods and myself have learned, avoiding everything you fear might keep you hanging on for dear life, but it isn’t much fun. It’s claustrophobic and confining. Life has no variety and risks the disappointment of unfulfilled dreams. By confronting those things we fear, we find new ways of being and doing, and it can open up a whole new world!

Women Empowered: Living a Life With Meaning

Join me for an INSPIRING and INFORMATIVE day of retreat that will guide you through the maze of opportunities, choices and dilemmas that face women in our society.

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Women Empowered: Living a Life With Meaning” is suitable for women of any age and walk of life. We’ll be tapping into our inner strengths, values and what creates meaning in our lives to identify the ways each of us can bring unique leadership to our families, work places and the wider community. You will develop a deeper sense of your own value and identify purpose-driven pathways into your future as you live a life with meaning.

CardsHands   CraftMaterials2   Work Benches

The day is suitable for PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT as well as PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT. Come along knowing that your workplace, friends, family and the wider community will all share the benefits of your participation.

The JOHN WALLIS FOUNDATION has generously supported this event through the provision of a grant so your financial outlay is only $20! Where else do you get such great value for so little expense!

Here are all the details:

Who: All women with an interest in developing their personal or professional leadership qualities in formal and informal roles in their families, workplaces or the wider community.

When: Thursday 15th September 2016 9am – 4:30pm

Where: St Mary’s Parish Centre Palmerin Street Warwick (between Wood St and Pratten St next to St Mary’s Upper Campus)

Fees: $20

Registration Fee includes m/tea, lunch, a/tea and handouts.

To Register: https://www.trybooking.com/LVQX

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This project is supported by donations to the John Wallis Foundation Small Grants Program, an approved project of the Foundation for Rural and Regional Renewal (FRRR). FRRR is a government philanthropy partnership, supporting projects that benefit rural, regional and remote communities.

Empowering Women Through Retreat Days

Condamine Assist’s Kathryn Walton is adamant about the benefits of “Women Empowered”, a series of retreat-style workshops offered to women in small groups within their communities. Kathryn brings a unique blend of enthusiasm, compassion, knowledge and skills to offer women an experience of self-awareness, insight and hopefulness.

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The first Women Empowered Retreat Day was developed and facilitated in Warwick by Kathryn and her wonderful colleague Janine Hills in April 2012. The project grew from the community’s response to several extreme weather events which highlighted the benefits of individual and community resilience in managing and recovering from uncertainty and unpredictability. The retreat days were designed for small groups of women with the following objectives:

  • identify sources of inner strength
  • identify strategies to effectively assist with managing daily stresses of personal, family and community life
  • build personal and community resilience in the event of unexpected, unwanted and natural events
  • enhance a sense of well-being and connectedness among women
  • promote mental health as an integral part of the wellness of individuals, families and communities
  • develop skills and confidence in goal-setting and decision-making
  • support the development of cognitive skills which enhance mental health

Activities during the retreat included mindfulness-based practices and reflective activities interwoven with information and discussion sessions. Feedback highlighted that Women Empowered successfully informed and supported the participants in a genuinely caring, safe and warm atmosphere.

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Following the pilot project, a further series of Women Empowered Retreat Days was facilitated by Kathryn and Janine in 2014 for the communities of Warwick, Maryvale and Emu Vale. Participation and feedback from the women involved in the retreats once again reflected the beneficial nature of this style of program for women.

In early 2016 Kathryn offered a Women Empowered Retreat Day in Killarney with a focus on creative and expressive arts to explore the topic “Me, Myself and I”. The combination of reflective and creative activities in the tranquil surrounds enabled new insights into self care and role identity for participants.

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Responding to community feedback, further Women Empowered Retreat Days will be offered in the future with a focus on various aspects of life relevant to women in our society. The next Women Empowered event is “Living a Life With Meaning” to be held in Warwick on Thursday 15th September 2016.

To keep informed of Women Empowered Retreat Days and other events, sign up to our email newsletter list, or send Kathryn an email kwalton@condamineassist.com.au