Asking for help to reach your goals: a true story

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Last week I wrote about asking for help. Today I want to share with you a true story about asking for help and how it was the exact strategy needed to reach a goal. This story is about me. Well, actually it’s really about you. It’s about how you can ask for help to reach your goals so that the challenges that will inevitably arise don’t become stumbling blocks on your way to success.

Setting goals is essential for growth and satisfaction

I believe that setting goals is essential for personal and professional growth and life satisfaction. There’s a delicate balance between accepting and embracing life as it is, and striving to be the best version of yourself. I don’t always get the balance right and sometimes find myself floundering in a pool of frustration as I strive for independence instead of striving towards my goal. This state of affairs is definitely not conducive to accepting and embracing life as it is! What I’ve discovered is that asking for help along the way does not necessarily erode your independence, but it does help you to accept and embrace life AND have the satisfaction of achieving success.

What's my plan of action to deal with this issue?

I set a goal and ran into a problem

A few years ago I set the goal of jogging continuously for 2 kilometres. I started off in the recommended way progressing from fast walking to walk-jog-walk and gradually increasing the time I spent jogging. I didn’t pay much attention to my nagging foot discomfort as it got worse. I’d always had trouble with my feet and figured I’d just need to put up with it, push through it, and prove to myself that I wasn’t a Drama Queen. After all, isn’t that what all athletes do? When I couldn’t stop the tears as I walked between my house and shed I realised this was a little bit more than my usual foot trouble.

Asking for help vs independence

Having been raised with a high degree of independence and an aversion to asking for help (I was the student who never raised their hand to ask a question in class), I realised this situation was one that I couldn’t solve by myself. I needed help from someone who had specialist knowledge and skills. The constant pain was a daily prompt that I needed to take action. So that’s what I did. I took myself and my pain, shame and embarrassment to a doctor for a review and x-rays, and then to a podiatrist. Armed with orthotics, physio exercises, iced bottles and advice on shoes, I went home to rehabilitate. It was definitely no magical overnight fix; in fact it took many months before I was able to take up my jogging goal again. If only I’d asked for help sooner, I’d have reached my goal much earlier than I did.

sports shoes

You have to do more than simply ask for help

I really appreciated this lesson in life when I made my way back to my podiatrist last year with a new foot issue. I had a very specific goal that I was committed to and knew that if I was going to accomplish it I really needed her help with some new foot pain issues! I had four months to get myself sorted because I had registered for an overnight hiking expedition with a group of strangers in very rugged, steep country. The group was made up of bush adventure therapists, and I was sure I’d struggle to keep up even if I didn’t have foot pain.

Enthusiastically and confidently I gathered my new orthotics together with my new hiking shoes and new sports shoes and went home. I diligently did my exercises and physio every day, but the improvement was not as rapid as I’d hoped. A few weeks later I had a review with my podiatrist. I told her I’d been consistently doing the exercises but my foot was only a little bit better and I was worried it wasn’t going to get me up those steep rocky hills in another couple of months. The deadline was looming and I was losing hoping that I’d be able to reach my goal despite asking for help before things got really bad.

My podiatrist sensed my frustration and understood my goal-oriented approach to life. She did what I do in my counselling sessions with clients – she ran through my ‘homework’ checklist:

  1. Had I been wearing my orthotics? Yes!
  2. Had I been doing the calf stretches and massage at least twice a day? Yes!
  3. Had I been using the phsyio gel AND ibuprofen to reduce inflammation? “Ummm… no….. I thought that was just for the pain and I thought I’d be okay without it”
  4. Had I been icing my foot regularly, not just when it was really painful? “Ummm…no…”

Okay, so I’d THOUGHT I had been consistently following instructions but I hadn’t. I’d gone into autopilot mode following my ‘old’ treatment plan and had mentally filtered out some of the critical steps in the new treatment plan. Once I began following the plan completely, I was well on my way to achieving my goal. This consultation was a pivotal event for me. I realised how important it is to not only ask for help, but to listen to it carefully and follow through with every piece of advice.

bush adventure therapists on expedition

Choosing to ask for help is the balance between independence and success

Over the past few years I’ve thrown myself into the practice of asking for help from a range of professionals so I can reach my health and fitness goals as well as my business goals. Goals don’t have to be lofty to be valuable. They can target your ordinary everyday life, like learning to make your own muesli or re-potting a plant. When you set a goal and choose to ask for help, you’re finding that balance between independence and striving towards success, whatever that means for you.

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Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections in ‘Daisy Spoke’ that inform, inspire and empower women to a healthy and active lifestyle.

Asking for help

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Does it come as any surprise to you that one of the most common fears people have is related to asking for help? Yet asking for help is exactly what can help us move forward, achieve success, overcome challenges and experience a sense of fulfillment.

What IS the best way to deal with fear so that it doesn’t become a stumbling block and limit your success in life?

In this article I share my tips on managing one of our most common, unspoken fears – asking for help.

Fear is an obstacle to asking for help

Over the past few years my community has been impacted massively by severe drought and bushfires. Before that there were floods. With government and community support flowing in, it’s been interesting to witness how few people asked for the help that was available to them. Yes, we could argue that some of it wasn’t the right sort of help, or not offered in ways that were inviting and accessible. But during confidential one-on-one conversations with farmers, business owners and residents, it was evident that a number of fears were pretty big obstacles to asking for help such as hand-outs from charities and support from health professionals.

fear and possibility

Fear is the voice in your head that tells you not to ask for help

I like to describe fear as the voice in your head that tries to keep you safe. In the case of (not) asking for help, the voice of fear can bring up feelings of shame, lack of worth and pride. The voices of fear say things such as:

  • They’ll think you’re stupid if you ask for help.
  • You should be ashamed of yourself for getting into this predicament.
  • You never get anything right, you’re a failure.
  • Other people need / deserve help more than you.
  • It’s your own fault and you don’t deserve help. If only you had done [X] then this wouldn’t have happened.
  • You should have been prepared for this to happen, now you have to put up with the consequences.
  • You got yourself into this, you’ll have to get yourself out of it.
  • Asking for help is a sign of weakness.
  • Taking handouts would prove how lowly you are.
  • If you ask for help they’ll say ‘no’ then you’ll feel even worse.
  • Fear is trying to keep you safe but sometimes it oversteps the mark

Fear is trying to keep you safe but it can overstep the mark!

It’s just as well you have an in-built system of staying safe because there are dangers in our world that you need to prepare for and protect yourself from. Fear gets you ready to fight off the danger, run away and hide from it, or freeze. Even when there is no logical risk of danger, fear will continue to search for the possibility of it … just in case. This includes physical as well as emotional danger.

In most situations, asking for help isn’t going to put you in physical danger especially when it comes to asking for help that’s been offered to you by organisations and governments to assist with natural disasters. However emotional safety is at risk. Asking for help means opening a part of yourself that you usually keep hidden away. You feel vulnerable asking for help because those voices of fear have been shouting loud and clear and before you know it, you believe every word they say – even if it’s not true! In an effort to keep you safe, fear can overstep its mark and keep you small and scared, floundering in the wilderness of independence and isolation.

fight flight freeze OR pause breathe think

Put fear back in its place

Despite how tempting it might seem to completely do away with fear altogether, it’s an essential mechanism for survival. You can use the following strategies to keep fear in its place so that you don’t avoid asking for help when it could actually be, well, quite helpful to do so!

Listen to the voices of fear

It will seem strange at first, but no, it doesn’t mean you’re going crazy! What’s behind your voices of fear? Is is worry about what others think? Is it about people-pleasing? Is it shame and feelings of lack of worth? Guilt? A sense of failure? A desire for independence? Something else? When you get to know what’s behind your fear, you can respond to that instead of the fear itself.

Practise noticing when fear steps across the line of reason

Keep practising this noticing technique your whole life long. Simply noticing and remembering that fear is trying to keep you safe can settle those voices down a little bit.

Speak back to the voices of fear that are stopping you from asking for help

You could say:

  • Where’s the evidence for that?
  • Just because that happened before doesn’t mean it will happen again.
  • I pay my taxes and I deserve to claim some of that back in help.
  • We’re all wiser with hindsight. I did the best I could with the knowledge and skills and resources I had then. I can do my best now and that includes asking for professional / financial help.
  • I ask the solicitor for specialist advice about legal matters. I ask the garden shop for specialist advice about my garden. I ask the shoe shop for advice about buying new shoes. I can ask for help for anything I like including my relationships, my finances, my mental health.
  • If I ask for help, it will make other people feel like they can ask for help too.
Use some metaphors to re-imagine how your fear is behaving and how you could manage it

For example, you can picture yourself in a car putting fear in the back seat, strapping it in with a harness, and taking charge of the steering wheel yourself. If you are avoiding asking for help because the voices of fear are jumping up and down and shouting at you that everyone will think you’re stupid, don’t allow them to take control of your every movement. Be in charge of your emotions rather than allowing them to be in charge of you.

Another metaphor is to imagine that your voices of fear have a volume dial. You have control over how loud you allow your voices to be. Dial them down when they are clearly being irrational and there’s no evidence for what they are saying. Allow the volume to be louder when the risk of danger is higher.

Tell someone that you’re feeling reluctant about the idea of asking for help

Worries like these hate the light of day and as soon as you bring them out into the open, they tend to reduce in size or go away altogether. Fears about asking for help can seem very worrying when we keep them to ourselves; they gain power in your silence. Talking about your fears can lead to practical solutions that make it easier to ask for help.

Asking for help is not a sign of weakness.

It uses inner courage and strength. Asking for help is a good thing. It’s how you find out information, learn and grow. It means you put the well-being of your loved ones above any fears or misgivings you harbour about asking for help.

are you feeding your fears

Use fear as a stepping stone to asking for help and achieving success

When you are ready, willing and able to ask for help, you put yourself in a powerful position to move beyond the position you’re currently in – whether that’s financial stress, relationship difficulties, health problems or anything else. You position yourself to succeed and experience a sense of fulfillment by overcoming the challenges. Don’t let fear become the stumbling block that prevents you from asking for help. Use it as a stepping stone to success.

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Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections in ‘Daisy Spoke’ that inform, inspire and empower women to a healthy and active lifestyle.

Get Organised: working from home

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Have you needed to get yourself and your household organised so you can be working or studying from home during the current coronavirus isolation? In this article I share why working from home works well for me (at least at the moment!), the fact that it can take a bit of experimentation to get it right for YOU, and a list of things that I find helpful to work effectively from my home office including systems, tools, routines, and all the other invisible stuff that people often don’t talk about.

Over the last couple of months we’ve seen an unprecedented rise in numbers of people working from home all round the globe. Even though there’s been a gradual transition towards remote work over the past few years, the current wave of moving work to home is absolutely astounding to witness. Getting organised to work from home is just one of many significant changes the world is adapting to during the COVID-19 pandemic.

How are you getting along with it?

I had a love-hate relationship with working from home for a long time

I’m sitting in my home office as I write this blog. At the moment I’m loving it! You see, I’m used to working from home, but that’s not to say I haven’t ever struggled with it! I had a love-hate relationship with working from home for a long time, and I’ve learned what works for me and my family in the space I have. Being self-employed, I’ve pivoted my business a couple of times over the years to better fit my vision, my family and my desired lifestyle. And that means I’ve needed to adapt and re-adapt more than once.

Kathryn looking at camera with wide eyes and smiling. Background of rainforest.

These days a lot of my work can be easily done from home and it saves a lot of money in office rent! My days are mostly spent preparing for workshops, collaborating by email, managing and promoting projects, applying for grants, using video-conferencing and phone for consultations, and of course writing. Not being able to lead bush adventure groups, retreats or workshops, or meet up in person with collaborators at the moment, means I now have space in my day to create my new podcast. This is also easily done from home. All in all, working from home is a really good fit for me.

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Getting organised to work from home will take some experimentation

I’m going to share with you a list of things that works for ME with the responsibilities I have and the home environment I’m in. You can use this list to inspire your imagination to make working from home much more do-able for you.

This year, 2020, is the first time in 24 years that I haven’t had school-age children with all the responsibilities that brings. It really has made a huge difference to my work output even though we’re a family of introverts and there isn’t a lot of noise or activity in my neighbourhood! I live out of town on a property in regional Queensland, Australia. YOUR responsibilities, family commitments, home environment, culture, workplace expectations, personality and supports will all have a bearing on how you get organised so you can work from home. It will take some experimentation, practise and negotiation with your employer to optimise how effective and efficient it is!

Patiently persist!

What does it take to get organised so you can work from home?

Here’s my list of the most important systems, routines and equipment I use to keep myself organised when working from home:

The actual office
  • Reliable internet (which only came into being in my region a few short years ago – such a blessing!)
  • Computer with webcam
  • Printer
  • Smart phone
  • Stationery (yep – good old notepads, pens, sticky notes, stapler, diary etc)
  • Yearly planner
  • Desk and chair adjusted for ME to support MY posture
  • A quiet space for my office that also provides privacy for calls, video-conferencing and note taking
  • Office door that gets closed during confidential discussions or when I need to reduce distractions
  • A window to look outside, let the natural light in and let the breeze through
  • Resources, books and filing cabinet

Make a list!

Systems and tools
  • Asana for project management and daily to-do’s – I love checking off my completed tasks and replicating projects on Asana to save my time. Asana can also be shared in a work team and it syncs beautifully between your devices so it can update in real time.
  • Keep Notes” – I use this for lists and it also syncs between devices
  • Canva for basic graphic design
  • Paper notepad systems – I have separate A4 notepads with different coloured covers for different purposes eg notes from training programs, notes from meetings with collaborators, notes about amazing business ideas that I don’t want to forget
  • Alarm – I set a timer for some work tasks and use the alarm for meeting reminders
  • Spreadsheets – I still prefer pen and paper but electronic spreadsheets have their advantages. I use them to log my time and budgets on various projects
  • Email program – I close it down when I don’t have to have it open because it’s a distraction
  • WordPress – mostly easy to edit by myself to keep my website, blog and web shop updated
  • Mail Chimp – stores subscriber lists and templates for outgoing emails

The challenge with time management is to manage ourselves

The invisible part of getting organised
  • Boundaries – This is probably THE MOST IMPORTANT aspect of getting organised to work from home. Set boundaries or parameters around your availability, work hours, work space, people, emails, phones, meal breaks, toilet breaks, social media, housework, cooking, grocery shopping, everything! If it’s outside your work hours, turn it off. If it’s not being used in the moment, turn it off.
  • Distractions – Turn off notifications on anything that really doesn’t matter or that distracts you during work time. Create rules about interruptions and be ready to gently remind others about them. Use self-discipline (see below).
  • De-stress your workspace – A cluttered workspace can add to your stress levels. Eliminate what you don’t REALLY need and add some stress-reducing features such as a pot plant, a painting or calming music. Keep your workspace tidy and uncluttered by developing systems to ensure that it doesn’t become a dumping ground for ‘stuff’.
  • Places and spaces – Create designated places and spaces for work materials, tools, resources. And then use them rather than spreading everything across the room or the house. Keep it organised – especially anything confidential.
  • Legal issues – Check with your employer, insurer, council and landlord about your rights and responsibilities regarding working from home.
  • React vs respond – If a new task comes up and it can be done in less than 2 minutes, do it now. Otherwise schedule it.
  • Self-care and self-discipline – These go hand in hand. Stick to the task you’re working on and manage distractions. Imagine that your boss, colleague or a video camera is watching (this is not meant to make you feel paranoid!) – what would you be doing differently? Are your actions aligned with your values and intentions?

Are my actions in alignment with my values when working from home?

  • Rewards – Reward yourself with a relaxing activity when you’ve achieved your work goals, reached the end of your work hours, or stayed on task. This is a great way of marking the switch between work and personal time.
  • Task Lists – Write a list of tasks for each day, categorise them, prioritise them and cross them off when you’ve completed them. Keep your daily to-do list short and keep another list of lesser priority tasks handy that can be brought up as your list gets shorter. I use Asana because I can categorise tasks into different projects and re-prioritise them as needed by sliding them over to the next day or next week. I used to use my diary or notepad or sticky notes – use whatever system works for you.
  • Sense of humour – A sense of humour doesn’t go astray – I’m working on that one 🙂
  • Family / household support – Talk to your family or housemates, including children, to plan how to meet everyone’s needs through the day (and night). Enlist help and support and work as a team as much as possible. Everyone can contribute to deciding on the priorities and how they will be put into action.
  • Systematise your meal times – Plan meals ahead including who’s cooking each night and what time you’ll eat. This also helps optimise your time grocery shopping!
  • Batch as many tasks as possible – Using batching techniques for work and personal tasks. I batch my social media design and scheduling as well as my baking which can be frozen and used later.
  • Put the big rocks into your day first – Plan the little tasks around the bigger tasks that are less flexible or time consuming. Watch my video on getting organised by putting the big rocks into your day first.
  • Time your tasks – Plan your trickiest work tasks for when you feel most alert and when the house is at its quietest.
  • Be consistent and clear – Put your work times up on your door, fridge, notice board or anywhere that your family will see it, or maybe an OPEN and CLOSED sign. You can also add work times into your email signature, Google business page and other web-based applications. If you respect your own boundaries, others are more likely to as well.
  • Move more, sit less – Get up and move around regularly, at least every 20-30 minutes. It can be tempting to stay working if you’re in flow and everything is quiet but your health and well-being needs you more.
  • Delegate jobs around the house – Invest time in teaching others how to do things for themselves. Don’t be a martyr to your work or to the household. This is an opportunity for everyone to learn and develop skills for life rather than another thing to feel guilt about.
  • Wear a uniform or work hat – Create a mental and visual boundary between work and personal hours by wearing a uniform, designated work clothes or even a hat that signifies to others as well as yourself which ‘mode’ you are operating in.
  • Celebrate – Identify, acknowledge and celebrate when things go well! It’s ever so easy to get caught up in what’s problematic without being present for the little wins and moments of joy along the way.
  • Problem-solve – Persist, be patient and get creative when something isn’t working so well. This is an experimental time for many workers and employers. View it as an experiment and explore the challenges and the possible solutions.
  • Connect – Create or request opportunities to connect with your work tribe and other supporters regularly by having online or phone meetings, morning teas and brainstorming sessions.
  • Think outside the box – Create opportunities to make things work! Working standard office hours may not work when you’re working from home especially if you are also supervising children playing and studying. In fact, it’s unlikely to work! For example, I typically do my internet-heavy tasks (eg watch training videos, upload videos) before 7am because that’s my off-peak internet time. Then I’ll spend a few hours of personal time before getting back to work till late afternoon or evening. I aim to leave my social media tasks till late in the day, use normal business hours for connecting with colleagues, and spend my most energised hours on tasks that need the highest level of concentration.

With any obstacle quote

Wow there really are so many aspects of getting organised to work from home when you start to list them all out! This is not an exhaustive list and some of them won’t work for you in your situation. But I do hope it gives you some hope and some ideas to work on for yourself. Let me know how it’s going for you!

Hot chocolate and home baked muffin
Time for hot chocolate and home baked muffins!
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Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections in ‘Daisy Spoke’ that inform, inspire and empower women to a healthy and active lifestyle.

How to keep exercising during the coronavirus pandemic

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In this article I’ll be sharing 20 ways to keep exercising during the coronavirus pandemic. Whether you are able (and allowed) to get outdoors or whether you have to stay indoors while you’re isolating, there are plenty of ideas here to keep your body moving and your mind feeling at ease.

Isolation around the world during the coronavirus pandemic

No matter where you live in the world as I write this blog post, you will be impacted by the COVID-19 pandemic as well as the health and government directives to manage its spread. Many people are isolating themselves at home or in hotels, and options to spend time outdoors and to exercise and socialise have been restricted.

But, you need to continue to nurture your health including your mental health. You may need to be creative in how you get your regular exercise fix, your outdoors time, and how you socialise.

Mental health risks during isolation

For myself, one of the biggest fears I had about isolation practices was concerning my mental health and the mental health of other people. Vigorous exercise, time in nature, and deep connections with others form the foundation of my ability to function. Without them, I’ve really struggled in the past. And I know I’m not alone. Exercise and movement also boosts your immune system which is incredibly important now too, and it provides protection against future disease.

Stay active and stay connected when you can’t get about freely

I’ve collected together some ideas to help you stay active, stay connected with the outdoors, and stay connected with others during periods of isolation. These ideas are just as useful for other times in your life when you can’t go out as freely as you’d like to such as:

  • when you have to stay home to care for young children or someone who is not well
  • during times of injury, sickness or limited mobility
  • when your non-working hours are after dark
  • when you’re travelling

Caution: check your local regulations about isolating during the coronavirus pandemic

Of course, you need to pick and choose, or innovate your own ideas based on your own circumstances, what your local regulations require and what resources you have access to. Not all these ideas will suit everybody or every situation. Naturally keep your physical distance from others during the pandemic, and don’t take any unnecessary risks that might result in injury and the need for medical assistance. Another thing – be mindful of the level of noise and disturbance you might make if you share a house with others, live in an apartment building, or if you live on a small block.

We’re all in this together!

Let me know if you have other ideas to add to mine and we’ll include them in a follow post! Remember, we’re all in this together and supporting each other is the best way to overcome challenges like this.

fear and possibility

20 ways to keep exercising during the coronavirus pandemic

  1. YouTube videos provide a wide selection of workouts for you to do in your own time at home. Look for ones that have been created by accredited instructors or recommended by exercise physiologists or physiotherapists.
  2. Virtual gym classes enable you to participate in a class in real time. Generally virtual classes are streamed live and everyone participates at the same time from their own location. Check if your local gym is offering these (most gyms have closed their face to face services at the time of writing), or search for online businesses and exercise apps which offer this.
  3. Home equipmentMake use of what you have at home such as weights, skipping rope, Swiss ball, steps, and old exercise DVDs . You can adapt everyday household items too such as water bottles or cans of food for weights, and don’t forget the stairs in your house can add value to your workout too.
  4. Virtual accountability buddies can check in with each, hold each other accountable to daily activities, and support each other to problem-solve issues as they come up. You can probably find an accountability buddy amongst your contacts, friends or work colleagues.
  5. Get out where and when you can. Look for opportunities and make the most of them while you can. If your local park is open and it seems quiet around dinner time, that might be a good time to get out there because you never know when places like that will close, or when your household will be quarantined.
  6. Plan and track your exercise in a journal to keep yourself committed and valuing your daily exercise on an ongoing basis. Take it another step forward by tracking how you felt before and after your workouts as well as your recovery experiences.
  7. Callisthenics, stretches, and body weight exercises were probably part of your school Physical Education classes. Do you remember star jumps, lunges, squats, jogging on the spot, push ups, and planks? If in doubt about injuries or medical conditions seek advice from an exercise physiologist or doctor first.
  8. Put on some music and dance and move to the rhythm! This isn’t about your style or skill – it’s about moving and having fun! Invite your household to join in.
  9. Chair yoga is great if you are not feeling well, have balance problems or limited mobility. Look on the Internet for workouts by yoga instructors who have adapted traditional yoga for use in seated positions.
  10. Street dances / classes are happening around the world in some suburban areas. Check if this is allowable in your area, and if so, organise a designated time for you and your neighbours to come out into your front gardens or patios for a dance-off or workout. Remember to maintain your physical distance!
  11. Backyard workouts are as varied as your imagination. Is there a job in the yard you’ve been meaning to do ‘one day’? You’ll get a great workout lifting logs, moving rocks, pruning trees and digging in the garden. You can also create an outdoor workout space in which you can jump obstacles, climb a pole, move through an obstacle or slalom course, practice bike handling or skate boarding skills, run around with the kids, or play games with your pet dog.
  12. Birdwatching from home is an activity that can have you moving gently and quietly around your garden, or if you are not able to go outside, watching from your balcony or window. Grab a bird identification book from your shelves or research your finds on the Internet or using an app such as eBird. There are also plenty of online forum and social media groups sharing birdwatching experiences.
  13. Mindful walks are another gentle activity that can be done in your own yard, footpath, or even indoors. Bring your attention to the sensations of placing your foot down and slowly moving your weight, lifting your foot and placing it forward. You can also bring your attention to the sensations in your legs and the rest of your body as you walk.
  14. Be a kid again! What did you do when you were a kid? Active kids don’t need dedicated exercise or outdoors time because their activity tends to be spontaneous and spread throughout the day. What did you do when you were a kid? I played elastics, tiggy / chasey, Red Rover, trampoline, balance games such as balancing on a log, backyard cricket and soccer, and hitting a ball against a wall. Don’t leave it only to the kids – these activities are perfect for any age!
  15. If you have children living in your household, get down on the floor and play! Games like wrestling (gentle of course!), kneeling chasey and indoor hockey can give everyone a great workout.
  16. If your National Parks, regional parks and State Forests are open and are not busy with other people exercising, go for a walk or a bike ride being careful not to stretch yourself past your comfort zone by taking any unnecessary risks or going off track.
  17. Make your own workout space at home by creating a dedicated exercise space (if you have the room) in a spare room, a section of the living room, the garage or the verandah. If you don’t have enough space for this, you can get yourself organised by creating a dedicated storage area for the equipment you use in your workouts.
  18. Use an App to track your activity levels, and if you’re into it, you can share your stats with your friends.
  19. Create circuits or stations with a variety of exercises, moving from one station to the next every minute (or longer or shorter if you prefer). Keep moving around the circuit to complete your workout.
  20. Use active indoor games like indoor hockey, quoits, and freeze as an alternative to your usual workout whilst having fun with your family or housemates.

Plan of Action

Now it’s your turn – what will YOU do?

Now it’s your turn to put these ideas into practice so that you look after your health, including your mental health in spite of the limitations you have during a period of isolation. Which of these ideas would you like to try? Have you got some other ideas to share with our readers? I’d love to hear from you and include your ideas in a future post. How will YOU keep exercising during the coronavirus pandemic?

You can listen to this article on the Outdoors is my Therapy podcast!

Daisy Spoke avatar has long curly hair and smiling mouth

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections in ‘Daisy Spoke’ that inform, inspire and empower women to a healthy and active lifestyle.

How to keep exercising outdoors in the drought

“How CAN you keep exercising outdoors in the drought????”

I’m writing this blog post because over the past year lots of people have said they just don’t know how I can keep exercising outdoors in the drought. We typically think of nature as nurturing and health-giving, a place of solace and retreat. Being confronted by a shockingly dry environment with frequent bushfires, brown landscapes that used to be green, National Park closures, and dry waterways, it’s clear that nature has a shadow side as well.

flowers before the drought

“It’s REALLY tough!”

To be completely open, I’ve also questioned how I can keep exercising outdoors in the drought. The whole climatic situation has been tough. Really tough! The ripple effect of the drought has swept up farmers, wildlife, local businesses, ‘town’ people, and those in the cities. We’re all affected in various ways either directly or indirectly. There’s a pervasive and damaging sense of hopelessness, and like any emotion, it’s contagious. Yet a sense of hope is exactly what we need to survive difficult or traumatic situations. Where there’s hope, there’s life. Without it, we spiral into a self-fulfilling doom and gloom mentality.

Exercising outdoors has been very confronting. I can’t walk on my home trails without seeing or smelling death. The brown dust colours my view as if I’m looking through a sepia filter. Ticks are in plague proportions. Swarms of good ole slow country flies are driving me nuts. The heat is unbearable. And there’s not enough water for washing your hair after a workout.

My stress tank is overflowing! How about you?

My connection with nature runs very deep, as does my yearning to be active. But in this tough time, I also came down with shingles. My stress tank began to overflow. I had to do something differently. Bushwalking and bike riding whilst constantly thinking about the drought and feeling unwell was contributing to the stress.

So what CAN you do when being in nature is SO stressful?

You have to put your creative thinking hat on to find a solution when things get tough. What worked before is no longer effective. The questions people keep asking me (and that I wanted solutions for too) are:

  • How can I reconnect with the side of nature that heals and nurtures and teaches?
  • How can I enjoy my time outdoors without feeling overwhelmed?
  • What mindset shift do I need?
  • What actions do I need to take?
  • How can I keep exercising everyday?
exercising in the drought
Exercising in the drought has it’s challenges

So I set you to explore this new territory and experiment with the possibilities!

Here are 6 solutions that I’ve discovered. I hope they work for you too!

1. Podcasts

If you haven’t got on the bandwagon yet, then you really need to! Podcasts are audio shows, a bit like a radio show, that you can either stream from the Internet or download onto a device to listen to later. I download episodes from my favourite shows onto my phone, plug my ear phones in, and listen to inspiring, energising interviews while I walk. Instead of focusing my attention on my surroundings, I lose myself in the show and arrive back home with excitement for life and new ideas to put into action. Watch out for a future blog post about my favourite podcasts suitable for Android or Apple.

2. Set an Intention

Before heading out on a walk or ride, I often choose an intention – something I want to focus on or get out of my experience. This is a personal choice, so it can be anything at all. Some of the intentions I’ve set for myself go like this:
“Today I will notice new growth”
“Today I will focus on the sensations in my legs”
“Today I will find fun”
“Today I will discover colour”
“Today I will notice sounds”

3. Mindful Walking

With mindful walks I like to focus on one sense at a time and when I notice my mind has wandered away from my body, I gently bring it back to rest on my senses. I’ve especially enjoyed focusing on my sense of hearing – noticing the many different bird calls, the sounds of the breeze in the trees, my footsteps on the ground, insects buzzing around, wallabies bounding along. I usually focus on one sense for a few minutes, then move onto another one. With my sense of touch, I focus on how it feels to have clothes on my skin, feet in my shoes as I take a step, muscle movement, sunscreen on my face, leaves brushing my skin. When I focus on my sense of sight, I challenge myself to find colours and light and patterns that I don’t normally notice. You can also use a meditation app with a guided practice for mindfulness of walking.

4. Photography

I’ve discovered that taking photos along the way really helps me to bring my attention to the beautiful things. Sometimes I combine photography with an intention or a mindful walk so that I can collect images that bring me joy, and at the same time it helps my brain to collect evidence that there is hope.

5. Make it Social

Walking or riding with other people can be really helpful because the focus is on that invisible connection between myself and someone else. Give me a deep and meaningful conversation with a friend any day, plenty of laughs, a chance to debrief the stuff of life that drives me crazy, and to celebrate the rest. Sometimes, too, there’s a sneaky competitive edge that sees me running or riding faster when I’m with others. Inevitably that ends up in a heap of laughs too, gasping for air, heart pounding out of my chest, and the satisfaction that I’ve done my weekly interval training.

6. Mix it up

I’ve always said “I’m not a gym person”. I’ve built a business and identity around my outdoor adventures. BUT, being unwell and being in the drought has helped me re-set my rigid thinking about exercise. Instead of going outdoors everyday, I went to an aqua class with a friend, did loops of the river walk in town where it’s a bit greener, and took up an irresistible offer to join a gym. I’ve extended the variety of exercise I get which is a fantastic thing! It will help me enjoy and have greater success with my outdoor adventuring which I’m still doing at least a couple of times a week. Going to the gym also gets me focusing on my sadly neglected strength training (one of those things I really ‘should’ be doing at my age!), all whilst staying out of the flies and heat. I get to make new friends and pace myself sensibly (sort of) as I recuperate. At home I’ve also begun a more regular yoga practice – something I’ve been wanting to do but it’s been a lower priority until now.

To Sum Up: Choose Your Focus!

It’s really all about CHOOSING WHAT YOU FOCUS ON. When we feel like we have What's my plan of action to deal with this issue?no control or influence over a situation (like the drought), it’s important to push the pause button, think about it creatively, and choose your focus. Like many people, I’ve struggled with exercising outdoors in the drought. The ideas I’ve shared in this article have made a huge difference to me, my mental state and my physical health. My hope is that they help you too.

Let me know what works for you! Have you got some other ideas to share with our readers?

Daisy Spoke

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections in ‘Daisy Spoke’ that inform, inspire and empower women to a healthy and active lifestyle.

What is a Word of the Year and why do I need one?

“Word of the Year” ….. A word that represents a way of being, an attitude or a mindset that serves as a road sign guiding you towards a goal you want to achieve before the end of the year.

I LOVE having a word of the year! And not just any old word. I put a lot of thought into choosing my word (or phrase) so that it aligns perfectly with my goals for the coming year.

Why I began using a word of the year

I began choosing a word of the year a few years ago to help me stay on track with my goals. I’d been really busy at that time, juggling lots of different contracts and spending all my time trying to please every organisation using their own systems. I always felt behind, disorganised, and I put increasing pressure on myself to do all the things for everyone.

I yearned for something simpler. I wanted to feel calm, organised and satisfied with my work again. I wanted everything to be simpler but I felt stuck because I didn’t know how to get to that point. When I took the time to reflect, it was a pretty obvious decision to choose “simple” as my word of the year!

my word of the year - simple

Now, simple isn’t something you do. It’s a state of being or a mindset that guides the actions you take, a bit like a train track that keeps the train heading in the right direction. So, when I was faced with choices in the following year, I allowed my word of the year to guide me. I chose simple over complicated. I let go of all sorts of things that were in the way of me living a simple, calm and organised life.

My word of the year was a true shining light for me that year. Choosing a word of the year has become a very important routine for me, and one that I love to share with others.

Why you should have a word of the year too

You can use a word of the year to guide you towards a goal, to stay in alignment with your values, to help you pivot your business, or to create any other sort of change you would like to see in your life. When you allow your word of the year to be a core component of your decision-making, it will be a powerful tool for change.

How do you choose a word of the year?

Read through the following points and make a some notes as you word of the yearreflect. There is a free downloadable worksheet to help you do this on my website, or simply make notes in your own journal. Be careful not to get stuck thinking about all the reasons why ‘this’ can’t happen, and why ‘that’ wouldn’t work. This exercise is to help you focus on possibilities. Our brains spend enough time and energy on the problems, so let’s give it a break for a few moments!

1. Picture yourself 12 months from now.

  • What is one thing you would like to be different?
  • What is one SMART goal you’d like to achieve in the next year?
  • What is something you dream of, something you would like in your life?
  • Even if you don’t have a specific goal or a dream, do you have a vague idea or a feeling that you’d like something to be different in your life?
  • How would you like to be living your life?
  • What attitudes or ‘ways of being’ would you like to be living by?
  • What do you value most in your life? Are you living your life with these as your priority?
  • Do any of your answers stand-out to you? Are there any common threads running through your reflections?

2. What states of being or states of mind will be helpful for you to achieve your goal, dream or desired change?

This is all about HOW you need to BE, not what you need to do, for example being patient, staying grounded or having a bold attitude.

3. What word or phrase best reflects the state of being or state of mind that YOU would most like to focus on over the next year?

This can be your word of the year!

4. Write your Word of the Year down, think about it often, and visualise how it will guide you through the year.

When you feel sure that’s the word you most need or want, plaster it everywhere to keep it fresh in your mind. Make it the centre piece of your vision board. Create a wallpaper for your computer or phone. Write in the front of next year’s diary. Blu tac it to your bathroom mirror. The idea is to get it front and foremost in your mind so that it does the job you intend it to.

my word of the year - adventure

Words of the month, week and day

A year is a long time, and sometimes it helps to have some stepping stones along the way. You can run through a similar process to choose a word of the month, week or the day.

In the bizarre way that the subconscious works, my word of the day often floats into my conscious mind during quiet morning meditation time. It can be a bit like a feather in the breeze, wafting around mid air until it gently settles on the ground. But sometimes my word of the day blasts at me in a song from the radio. Other times it’s gifted to me in the wise words from a loved one or even when I’m listening to a podcast interview. However it happens, I’m always happy to grab it and run with it, knowing it’s all part of the process to help me get from here to there, and in alignment with my overall goals and values.

I’d love to hear from you – have you ever chosen a Word of the Year? How did it help you create an attitude, mindset or a way of being to guide you towards your goal?

Daisy Spoke

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections in ‘Daisy Spoke’ that inform, inspire and empower women to a healthy and active lifestyle.

Daisy Spoke: The Story Behind the Name

Kathryn Walton
Kathryn Walton: the blogger behind Daisy Spoke

Hello! My name is Kathryn Walton. I’m the blogger behind Daisy Spoke and I’m absolutely thrilled to have you visit me on my blog. I’d love to hear from you anytime and hope that we’ll get to know each other a lot more, have a chat here and there, and share stories that inspire. Stories that get to the heart and soul of the important stuff in life.

In this post, I’ll share a bit about why I created my blog “Daisy Spoke” and also a bit about the ‘me’ that’s sitting here writing. The me that’s so much more than a job title (“blogger” or “mental health social worker” or “mother” or “wife”). The real me. Where I started and how my life path has unfolded, the things I love to do, and my hopes and dreams for Daisy Spoke.

A regional life

Born in Brisbane, I’ve lived most of my life in regional Queensland including the Wide Bay area, Redlands (before it became a city in its own right), and more recently the Southern Downs. I love being close to the rural heart of our country with easy access to National Parks, spectacular sunsets, and views that go on for days and days. It’s a dream come true for my family. Everyday we wake up surrounded by native bushland and animals, and the starry night sky is absolutely breathtaking. As with everything in life, living in the bush has its harsh realities. The region has been significantly impacted by many years of drought that affects the livelihood and wellbeing of primary producers with ripple effects across the country and beyond. For myself, I also grieve deeply for the land, the plants, animals, empty waterways, and the fruit, vegetables and other plants I can no longer grow and harvest for my family. 

Study and work pathways

Going back a few years (or more!) I really didn’t know what I wanted to do out of school, and at someone’s suggestion I enrolled in Social Work at the University of Queensland. I spent the next four years feeling quite lost in my course, but stuck it out to the end. When I graduated I took on a job in child protection and later worked in youth support before making the exciting move back to regional Queensland with my husband and two young children. I completed more studies, had another baby, and over the years took on a variety of part-time and contract jobs. It seemed that as a Social Worker, there were many options available to me in regional Queensland including school counselling, hospital work, and the Child and Youth Mental Health Service. I could see gaps in the delivery of services that left vulnerable people without support. My passion for connecting with children led me to open my private counselling practice in 2005. With the flexibility of setting my own hours, I was better able to juggle the responsibilities of parenting and paid work.

From individual to group work

After many years of providing play-based therapy and simultaneously supporting parents (usually mothers) I began to offer groups and workshops for women focusing on building inner life skills such as resilience, and healthy lifestyle habits that impact positively on mental health. I’d learned how important these skills were in my own life, and I knew I could offer support to other women as they put them into practice too.

Daisy Spoke” is born

In my 40’s I discovered the joys and challenges of mountain biking. This parallel universe has never failed to deliver lessons that are mirrored in my everyday life, and so I was drawn to search for creative ways to inspire other women to engage in outdoor adventures. With the roll-out of the new broadband satellite system across the region, I had access to a reliable Internet connection for the very first time. Hence, my blog “Daisy Spoke” was born. Here was a chance to get my message beyond my geographical area, beyond the 1:1 face-to-face sessions, beyond the small group workshops. The Internet meant that I could now share stories that inspire and empower women everywhere to be the pro-active force they need in their own lives.

Why the name “Daisy Spoke?

It wasn’t hard choosing a name for my blog. Daisies are my favourite flowers. I love their simplicity, colour and tenacity to thrive in all conditions. “Daisy” is also a figurative name for all women and girls. “Spoke” is a word with multiple meanings. From a vital structural part of a bicycle wheel, ship’s wheel or an umbrella, to the action of voicing, expressing and representing. Daisy Spoke is a platform through which I can share my love and passion for those things that inspire and empower me in the hope that they might also inspire and empower you to thrive in life.

Daisy Spoke’s future

Although Daisy Spoke was founded in my mountain biking journey, I’ve also used it as a platform to share evidence-based information about mental health, wellbeing, and the value of life skills such as goal-setting, time management and self-talk. Looking into Daisy Spoke’s future, I can see her growing and blossoming, just like we all do when we’re loved and nurtured. My intention is to share more and more stories about mountain biking, bushwalking and outdoor adventuring; creating and connecting; women gathering together and gentle kindness. I want Daisy Spoke to inspire you to explore your inner and outer worlds, to get outside and to be as active as possible in nature whether it’s on your bike, on foot or by any other means, and to listen to your heart with kindness and compassion.

I’ve discovered how important it is to talk to yourself with kindness. This has been one of my lessons learned on my bike. You need to be a friend to yourself in order to get the most out of yourself: “What do I need right now? Do I need to spend time in nature? Do I need to move my body? Do I need to spend time in quiet? Or with other people? Do I need time and space to create beautiful things? Am I balancing time spent serving others, with time spent serving myself?”

So, who am I?

Hello, my name is Kathryn. I’m a blogger. I’m a mountain biker and bushwalker, a Mum and a wife. I’m a business owner and innovator. I like home-cooked nutritious food. I struggle to get myself to bed early (“There’s so much life to live!”) and I struggle to get up early (“I’m so tired!”). I’m a passionate advocate for the active outdoor lifestyle (it keeps me vaguely sane). I have a deeply creative heart that finds immense joy in sewing, painting and craft; and intense frustration in not being able to ‘do all the things’. And despite the fact that I felt so lost when I first left school, I can see now that my path was steadily unfolding before me and will continue to unfold. Who knows what’s around the next corner or the next mountain for this individual and her blog?

Daisy Spoke

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections in ‘Daisy Spoke’ that inform, inspire and empower women to a healthy and active lifestyle.

How to Look After Your Own Mental Health

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Many of us have grown up believing that to be a ‘good’ person we must always put others before ourselves. Whilst it’s important to care for others and contribute to society in positive and constructive ways, it’s very unfortunate that many people stop caring for themselves and find it difficult to ask for help. We don’t want to burden our families, friends or even our doctors with our ‘problems’ so we tell ourselves that things will get better soon if we keep going, keep pushing on, put on a brave face and try to figure things out for ourselves. There can be a lot of shame and worry that stops us seeking help.

It’s okay, and in fact completely normal, to have moments of despair, anger, sadness, disappointment, grief, anxiety, frustration and confusion. When we accept this is a normal part of being human, it can be a little easier to reach out and ask for help, or share our upsets with someone else. There are different ways you can access help without feeling like you are being burden on others around you.

1. Counselling

worries and mental health

My clients often tell me they come to counselling because they want a safe, confidential, unbiased space to talk through life’s challenges and unload the heavy issues they’ve been carrying. Counselling can also help you problem-solve, prioritise, and develop new skills and strategies. There are many types of counsellors so I recommend talking to your GP who can match you up with a counsellor to meet your needs.

GP Mental Health Treatment Plan

If your GP creates a Mental Health Treatment Plan for you, they can refer you to an accredited Mental Health Worker such as an Accredited Mental Health Social Worker, psychologist or other mental health worker with a Medicare Provider Number. You can then claim a rebate from Medicare for up to 10 sessions. Some Mental Health Workers bulk-bill or offer discounts for Seniors or Health Care Card holders.

Urgent Help

If you are feeling very stressed or suicidal, your GP or hospital doctor can refer you to a service that is ready to respond and support you very quickly.

Self-refer

If you prefer, you can self-refer to a counsellor but you will not be able to claim a Medicare rebate. You may be eligible to claim a rebate through your private health insurer however it is important to check before going ahead.

Public Health

Other services are available through the public health system which may be a good fit for your needs too. Your doctor can give you guidance on the best service for your needs.

2. ‘Low Intensity’ Face-to-Face Support

If you don’t think you need counselling but you’d like a bit of support, you may be able to participate in a local group or individual program such as mindfulness training or coping skills training. Once again, the best way to get connected with the right service is having a chat with your GP. Your regional PHN website may also also list these services. Many ‘Low Intensity’ services are funded or subsidised by the Federal Government or not for profit organisations which makes them more affordable.

(For example, if you live in the Darling Downs and West Moreton region you might like to have a look at a clickable map with a list of mental health services.)

3. Online Services and Supports

If you don’t think you need to see a professional, you can access online services and supports. This is not a substitute for individual counselling, but it can be a terrific way of finding information and support from the privacy of your own home. I suggest using websites that are supported or authorised by Australian government bodies or universities so that you know you are getting the best evidence-based information and support. Here are a few recommended websites to get you started:

Black Dog Institute

Black Dog Institute mental health

Black Dog Institute translates world leading research into easy-to-understand information to build a mentally healthy world. On this website you can find:

Beyond Blue

Beyone Blue mental health

Beyond Blue provides information and support to everyone regardless of age or where you live. On this website you can find:

  • Support services for yourself or someone else
  • Information about mental health including anxiety and depression
  • Online forums
  • Online web chat service (you can text or type a conversation with a support worker)
  • Phone and email support services

DV Connect and Womensline

DVConnect mental health

DV Connect Womensline is the only statewide telephone service offering 24/7 support for women who are experiencing domestic or family violence. They offer free, professional and non-judgemental telephone support wherever you live in Queensland. They can arrange practical assistance such as crisis counselling, intervention, transport and emergency accommodation for Queensland women and their children who are in danger from a violent partner or family member. Browse the website or call 1800 811 811 (free call from any public phone).

Men’s Line

Mensline mental health

Men’s Line offers telephone and online counselling for men with family and relationship concerns or mental health concerns. On this website you can find information about:

  • anger, anxiety, depression, stress, responsible drinking
  • relationship problems
  • family violence
  • how to help yourself or someone else who is having suicidal thoughts
  • telephone, online chat, and video chat counselling

Jean Hailes for Women’s Health

Jean Hailes for Women’s Health combines research, clinical care and practical education for women and health professionals. They translate and disseminate research and medical evidence into easy to understand health information. The website includes information about a very wide range of women’s health topics and includes:

  • booklets, fact sheets, articles
  • podcasts
  • webinars
  • recipes
  • tutorials
  • workplace health
  • Women’s Health Week

Do YOU have a favourite online resource? I’d love to hear! Send me an email with your tips and hints!

Daisy Spoke

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections in ‘Daisy Spoke’ that inform, inspire and empower women to a healthy and active lifestyle.

Calm on the outside, agitated on the inside

Calm on the outside, agitated on the inside. Does this sound like you? How is that for you? Is it working in your favour? Or is there something you’d like to change?

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Picture This

Goomburra landscape
The stunning landscape at The Grain Shed Retreat, Goomburra Valley (PHOTO CREDIT: Darling Downs Wellness Therapies)

I’d like to invite you to picture yourself relaxed and at ease sipping a cool drink as you gaze out at the rugged mountains and the ancient valleys that surround you. A gentle breeze reminds you of the changing seasons. Thinking towards your future, your confidence rises. Your calm demeanour is a reflection of genuinely feeling calm on the inside. You’ve gained clarity about your dreams and goals, and you’ve tapped into your inner strengths. In the company of like-minded women, you’ve acknowledged the challenges that have held you back. The time for change has come. You’re ready to do things differently, to make self-care a priority, to celebrate who you are, and to take actions that align with your values and purpose.

With a clear plan for working towards your personal goals, you know just what you need to do. You no longer waste your energy stressing over things you can’t change. As you focus more and more on those things you have control over, your circle of influence expands. As you become increasingly inspired by your dream, so too you inspire others around you. Despite the inevitable challenges, you stand grounded in confidence knowing that you’re never alone, that you have the inner and outer resources to maintain your momentum.

Does this sound like you? Or perhaps something you’d like to experience in life?

Inner self, outer appearances

No matter how you appear to others, you are the only one that truly knows your inner turmoil, struggles, challenges, and disappointments. You might go through the motions of being a high functioning worker, mother and partner, but inside you could be experiencing agitation or distress. Lost dreams, worries, a lack of fulfilment – these are just some of the experiences women often keep to themselves. Stewing away inside they create a hot bubbly mess that has us feeling bitter and helpless. But still, we push on. Not happy or content. But we keep on going.

What if I told you it doesn’t have to be this way?

It’s true ….. it doesn’t have to be this way. I know. I’ve been there. Several times. I’ve also walked alongside many women who’ve experienced something similar themselves. We all have a different story, different experiences, but there are also many common threads. By sharing these threads, we get to weave a new story. A more powerful story that builds us up, that empowers us, instead of depleting us.

Companionship, community and connection are key factors

Companionship and community are two of the keys to writing a new story. When we’re very isolated from others we have difficulty thriving. Looking back I can clearly see the turning points in my own life when I connected with the people who became my tribe. I’ve had a couple of very special relationships with other women who truly ‘got me’. They accepted me just as I was. They lifted me up and showed me there’s more to life than the narrow window I’d been looking through. They demonstrated assertiveness and values-based action. They were friends and mentors who have had a profound impact on how I saw myself.

In recent years I’ve also had the privilege of being part of a community of women who openly encourage, inspire, embrace, love and connect with each other in incredibly meaningful ways. This tribe of women reflects many of the values so important to me – independence, connection, innovation, peace, creativity, courage, companionship, community. They’ve taught me that I am enough. Just me. The way I am. No labels. No definitions. No limitations. And that’s given me the space to be even more than I ever thought I was or could be.

I’m still an introvert, I still love my time alone. But now it’s not lonely alone-time. I am deeply connected with others and I’m part of a tribe. We don’t desperately need to be with each other all the time. But the fact that we know we’re a stand for each other, that we’re part of a supportive community, makes each of us stronger and enables us to make a difference in our worlds – both inner and outer.

Women Empowered Retreats

Women Empowered Logo

This is my philosophy behind the Women Empowered Retreats. I know the benefits of connecting women together in deep, rich, meaningful conversation. I know the power of sharing stories in safe spaces. The power of connection and community. The power of knowledge and information sharing. The difference that inspiration makes to our sense of happiness, contentment, and fulfilment. The feeling of being calm on the inside, not just looking calm on the outside.

Every woman is drawn to our retreats for different reasons and will have a different experience from anyone else. Each retreat explores a different theme that weaves together elements of personal growth. But at each retreat we come with an open mind. We seek to be informed, inspired and empowered to be ourselves. We offer a gentle balance of information sessions, reflective activities, mindfulness practices, creative arts, movement, nature, and soul-nourishing food.

Whether you are simply looking for time and space to recharge, or if you are looking for a deeper meaning in your life, you will be inspired and empowered to live the life you love.

An invitation to discover calm on the inside

If this sounds like a slice of heaven to you, then we’d love you to join us for any of our upcoming retreats. This could be the beginning of your journey to discover what it feels like to be calm on the inside, or perhaps it’s an opportunity to connect with a community who will inspire you as you take action towards your dreams. Whether you’re a local or a visitor to the region, whether you come alone or with a friend, you’ll be joining a strong, growing community of women who know the value of self-care, personal growth, and connection with others.

Our upcoming “Women Empowered’ events include:

“Yarn & Yoga in the Country”
Friday 26th July 2019 during the Jumpers and Jazz in July Festival

(PHOTO CREDIT: Darling Downs Wellness Therapies)
  • Hike Your Mountain (June 2019)
  • Yarn and Yoga in the Country (July 2019)
  • Women’s Health Retreat (September 2019)
  • Spring Retreat (October 2019)

To keep up to date with details as they are released, subscribe to my emails via my website and follow me on Facebook.

Daisy Spoke

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections in ‘Daisy Spoke’ that inform, inspire and empower women to a healthy and active lifestyle.

7 ways to improve your mental health at work

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We spend a lot of our waking hours in the workplace so it’s no surprise that work and personal life impact each other. It’s an issue we mustn’t ignore. Many of us have been trained or at least socialised to separate our ‘professional selves’ from our ‘personal selves’. To put on our ‘worker’ hat at work, our ‘parent’ and ‘partner’ hat at home, and our ‘volunteer’ hat at weekend sports events. We juggle the different parts of ourselves, keeping our guards up and being careful not to cross boundaries. READ “HOW MANY HATS DO YOUR WEAR?”

But can we completely separate the different parts of our lives? And should we? What are the implications, both good and bad? And how can we re-integrate ourselves when we feel like we can’t keep it all together, or when there is a major change in our work or personal lives?

The real mental health issues in the workplace

Employees, managers and business owners are all in the same boat. Where do we even begin to sort out the issues? In late 2018 Bel du Bois from Darling Downs Wellness Therapies and myself surveyed our community. The results were really interesting. 54% of people said that multiple roles and responsibilities was one of the main health and wellness concerns in their workplace. Stress, unrealistic workloads and communication difficulties also rated very highly.

The struggle to keep it all together

I know first hand what it’s like to juggle family and work responsibilities, and *try* to be calm about it all. Many of us struggle with it, yet few of us talk about it openly. We feel pressure to appear to be coping, on top of things, and to have it all together. But pretending everything’s okay doesn’t make the stress go away. Work, family, home and personal health all suffer.

Whose responsibility?

There is increasing pressure on workplaces to address mental health and wellness issues. This is great because instead of sweeping it under the carpet, we’re beginning to talk about, to acknowledge it and to manage it better.

Obviously the responsibility doesn’t sit entirely with our workplaces. We also need to address industry regulations, state and national policy, and cultural norms.

As individuals we also need to take a degree of responsibility for those things within our control – that means taking a good hard look at ourselves, our reactions in stressful situations, our attitudes, our behaviours, and the supports we choose (or don’t choose) to access.

What this means is that to improve mental health we really have to take a multi-tiered Plan of Actionapproach. We must support workplaces and managers and business owners to create a mentally healthy culture. We need to advocate for industry reform, policy and legislation that reflects a mentally healthy culture. And we need to support individuals and groups in our community to develop inner skills and behaviours (that is, the things we can control!) that enhance mental health. Read on for some tips on how you can begin to put mentally healthy actions in place today.

7 ways to improve your mental health at work

1. Remember that you are a human, not a robot. Life isn’t all smooth sailing, blue skies and cheery hearts. You have thoughts and emotions. They are real. You react to the world around you. The world around you reacts to you too.

2. Find your tribe. A supportive, open, caring community around you is what we all need. If you don’t have that, take steps to create it.

3. Build your resilience – physical and mental. The best ways to begin doing this are through exercise, having active hobbies, feeding yourself nutritious food, getting good quality sleep, and developing a powerful mindset.

4. Expand your stress management skills. You can never have too many tools in your “Coping Kit”! Read books and articles on stress management. Go to workshops. Find a counsellor. Listen to podcasts. Do an online course.

5. Find constructive ways to address your workplace issues. This may mean direct communication with your employer, industry, union or association. There may also be changes you can initiate yourself that will make all the difference eg renegotiating your work hours, equipment available for you to do your job, or the length of your lunch break.

6. Make choices that nurture your mental health and physical health. Often it’s the little things that make the biggest difference, such as choosing to go for a walk at lunch time. But sometimes we need to muster up the courage to make the bigger decisions, such as changing jobs or moving locations.

7. Ask for help. If the first person doesn’t support you in the way you need, ask someone else. Keep going until you find the right person. There are so many online resources these days that you’re no longer limited to what’s available in your local area.

Ready for more?

Wellness in the Workplace

If you relate to anything in this post, I’d love you to join me for The Wellbeing Project, a collaboration between myself and Bel du Bois from Darling Downs Wellness Therapies. We’ll be delving into these topics (and more!) in detail in our dynamic, interactive workshop “Wellness in the Workplace” to be held in Warwick on Wednesday 13th March 2019. You’ll get the latest evidence-based information and proven skills and strategies to function at your best in the workplace and in your personal life. You’ll learn techniques to build your resilience, have more energy, manage your work and home stresses, and feel healthier and happier.

Creating and facilitating workshops brings me a lot of joy. I love knowing that I’m making a difference to a room full of people instead of only one person at a time. Bel and I have thoroughly enjoyed our planning meetings at the beautiful cafes around town and we’ve got so much amazingness in store for you. This workshop is definitely not a typical ‘dry’ boring training day!

So …..

Are YOU ready to re-energise, grow your coping skills, discover strategies and techniques to use at work and home, learn ways of communicating effectively with different personalities, and discover resources and supports to guide you into the future? You can have all of this when you choose to take positive action towards better health and wellness at work by investing one day of your life in “Wellness in the Workplace”.

Read more information or make a booking for “Wellness at Work”

More workshops coming soon! Subscribe so you don’t miss out!

Daisy Spoke

Discovering mountain biking as life’s ultimate parallel universe in her middle age, Kathryn Walton shares information and reflections in ‘Daisy Spoke’ that inform, inspire and empower women to a healthy and active lifestyle.